Michelle Branch, who no one has heard anything about for the past couple of years (should her star status be revoked by now), has just popped out a baby girl from her uterus. Named Owen . . um . . hold on. Owen? Isn't that a guy's name? It's not like Bobbi or Terri that have the "i" that denotes femininity. If she had named her Owin, then maybe it would have slid, but use the regular spelling? Are they confused? Do they not know that vagina means girl, penis means boy? Oh well, it's their kid. They could call her Charles Manson Branch for all I care.
So, where was I, oh yeah. Who'd want to put their penis in her anyway? She looks like she's got a bit of the down syndrome. Is her middle name "Corky". Maybe it's just that retarded perception of make-up usage that she's adhering to. Nice kabuki/clown motiff you're going for. The trucket hat makes it so much classier. But hey, ugly chicks need loving too right. Whoever jumped on that granade, mankind owes you a debt of gratitude. Just don't keep spawning with Branch. We don't need more ugly kids running around this world with too much money on their hands. Just look at the Osbournes. Yeegh.
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