Bovine Herd Munches on Cannabis

Finally U.S. cows have something to envy about their Russian counterparts. Russian cows in the Ural region will be fed about 40 tons of marijuana over the winter as officials just don't know what to do with it other than feed it to the herd. They can't just burn it as they usually do and here's why:

MOSCOW (Reuters) - "There is simply no other way out. You see, the fields are planted with feed crops and if we remove it all the cows will have nothing to eat," a Federal Drugs Control Service spokeswoman for the Urals region of Sverdlovsk told the paper.

Those lucky russkie cows. I can already see them stumbling around, asking the other cows metaphysical questions and giggling uncontrollably when they get milked. And speaking of milk, just what is that going to be like? After a steady diet of cannabis, some THC should seep into their mammary glands . . . right? There's only one thing to do about this. I'm going to start buying Russian milk. Screw the American prudish milk. Nothing but growth hormones in that crap.