Animals Vs Mazda

I had just driven out of my driveway this morning. I was headed to work, just like every other 5:30 AM for the past few months. Headlights were on, I was fully awake and then, out of nowhere, a fucking black cat darts in front of my car. I did not have time to swerve out of the way or break, and if you've ever seen the street I live in, there's not much space to swerve anyway.

I hear a "thump thump" and I know I've run over this cat. I'm not feeling much remorse though. I'm not a cat person. If that had been a dog, I would have gotten out of the car to check on the dog . . . and of course, any damage to my car. But, I kept driving and muttered a "too bad" while I shrugged my shoulders.

I looked in the rear-view mirror and to my surprise, I saw the black cat running around like if nothing had happened to it. Those fucking felines do have 9 lives. So, my lack of remorse and guilt at running over the cat were justified at that moment. I'm pretty sure the cat is greatful that I don't drive one of those hulking SUV's that are so popular but also killing our planet at the same time. If that had been the case, that pussy would have gotten pancaked on the concrete.

This event does remind me of another time, a few months ago, during the first days of Spring. Again, driving down the street, with my wife. I don't remember where we were headed off to. It's really inconsequential. What I do remember is seeing two little birds, chasing each other. One was probably trying to mate with the other. Unfortunately for them, one of the birds decided to fly low. Like . . . tire-level low. And to make things worse, the birds decided to fly low right when my car was passing through. So, I see these birds fly directly under my tires as I am driving past. I didn't hear a crunch or a thump, or any other onomotopoeia that would re-affirm the fact that I had just ended the lives of two love-birds . . . but I didn't see them fly away safely in my rear-view mirror.

So, I'm starting to think that my car has a sort of bloodlust for small animals. Maybe I should name it "Christine".