Full Contact Sleeping - Counter-Attack!

Some of you might remember a post from a few months ago where I detailed the abuse that I undergo when sleeping next to my lovely, yet violently subcouncious wife. Well, seems I have had enough of that, because yesterday, while sleeping, I punched her in the face.

Ok, so maybe it wasn't a full on punch. Let me explain further before you think that this is the next premise to a Lifetime movie of the week special. The way I remember it goes a little something like this. For some reason, I remained semi-lucid, but in a dream-like state while this was going on. I thought that I had seen a floating sandwhich and I was trying to get it. I must have muttered something about it, because my wife woke up and said "There is no sandwhich, go back to sleep". This is when I tried reaching up for it, but what I did not know, was that my whole right arm was full on asleep. I was probably sleeping on it. So, it begins to rise, but it tips towards her direction, and my open and devoid of feeling hand falls across her face.

She says to me "You just punched me in the face man, what the fuck". I, still muttering half asleep say: "I need to get the sandwhich, but my arm's asleep, help me out". I even started looking through the covers for this dream-sandwhich when I realized that . . . hey, maybe I dreamt the whole thing up. So, I went back to sleep.

In the morning, we both had a laugh about it, but my wife's version deviates a little from mine. In her story, she says I was asking for a sandwhich, and when she told me that we didn't have any, I punched her in the face.

Yes, I know how to treat women right.