DVD Tome "F"

This post is for the F's . . which are fantastic. Also . . . it's post #300 in this humble blog. And I know, readership around here is way down. I don't hussle as much as I used to do back in the day, but hey . . . that doesn't mean that the quality has declined. Quality around here couldn't get any lower than the bottom. Anyway, here it goes. On with the fantastic F's.

F.

Family Guy Presents: Stewie Griffin The Untold Story - This is the direct to DVD movie that would redifine the world of Family Guy. Swearing, sexual situations, their general shannanigans . . . all uncensored. Yay! Too bad it's not that great. I mean, it's got it's finer moments, but those are not all that fantastic as I thought it was going to be. But, regardless, if you're a huge fan of this resucitated FOX animated sitcom, then by all means, buy it.

Fast and the Furious, The - Yeah, don't laugh too hard. Sure, it's got Paul Walker, and his head is huge. And Vin Diesel is in it, and his head is also huge. How do they fit those two ginormous heads in one frame? Widescreen baby. So this all bang but zero substance car porn is ultimate unleaded compared to the 2nd outing which I wisely don't own. I hear they cast Bow Wow in the third upcoming movie. LOL. That's going to suck ass.

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within - This computer animated movie is gorgeous. The whole design of it, the characters, the vehicles, everything is fantastic, and it would make for a great game. Doesn't make for a great movie though. Sure, I watched this in the theaters and then got the movie which would lead you to believe that I am fond of this movie . . . but I'm not all that crazy about it. Then why did I buy this? How the hell do I know . . . impulse buy.

Finding Nemo - Pixar roxxors my soxxors. One of their best animated outings. I don't think there needs to be said anything about it . . . if you haven't seen it, then you're a tool. Why don't you just go watch Shrek over and over again and then take your life. You worthless tool!

Finding Neverland - All I head everytime that Johnny Depp is on TV is "Ooh, he's so dreamy" from my wife. Why did I get this cheapy pirated version of the movie then? To appease her. If I had not bought this for her, I probably would have been hanged by my testicles like Mussolini. So you understand now why I own this. Oh, and she really really likes Johnny Depp. Did I mention this?

Fight Club - Absolutely best movie about borderline gay anarchist men fighting for the sake of fighting. Not as great as the book, which I have a signed copy of, but Brad Pitt's charisma is hard to resist. I think I prefer a bloody Pitt rather than a perfectly coiffed Pitt. And Ed Norton is pretty good in this. Not that he's been good in anything else since, but in this he's good.

Firefly: The Complete Series - Best show killed by FOX ever. Even better than Family Guy. And that one came back. The dismal box office performance that the Serenity movie encountered surely secures that this series will never come back to television . . . even as a cheaply funded Sci-Fi channel series. Oh well, it was good while it lasted. I know that Joss Whedon might continue the adventures in comic book form, so there's hope for more Firefly stories out there. Let's just hope they get printed.

Following - Christoper Nolan's first feature, before he made Memento, it's also a time-jumble of a movie. This first outing shows the whole movie out of order. Not even in back to front order, it's all over the place. Makes for an interesting watch, but if you're a fan of linear storytelling, then there is an option of watching it in order. But where's the fun in that?

Frailty - Sam Raimi made movies before Spider-Man you know, and this little tale about a father who thought angels spoke to him and told him to call demons is pretty intense. It just so happens that these demons look just like regular people, and it's up to his kids to either help him or stop him. Great performances by everyone on the cast. Solid movie.

Freddy Vs Jason - Ahh, the match up that all horror nerds were looking for. Tits, blood, impalings, everything that made the two franchises great over the years is all here. You also get to see Freddy & Jason beating the crap out of each other which is a big plus. Get this if you're a horror nerd.

Frighteners, The - An early Peter Jackson film, actually, one of his first "Hollywood" movies. This one has Micheal J. Fox before he started to shake too uncontrollably and it's got some cool special effects that were also made by WETA, so you know they look great. It has a feel good ending and all, but this was just early work that lead to the making of the Ring Trilogy. Plus, the ghosts are funny . . . what more do you want? Seriously . . you want and you ask and ask for more and what do I get in return . . . bastard/bitch!

From Dusk til Dawn - This Tarantino/Rodriguez vampire action film has that sexy Salma Hayek doing the snake dance that is worth the price of the buy. You also get a full length documentary on the making of this, so it's quite the bargain. Salma snake dance, story by Tarantino, full length doc, vampires, and a crotch gun sporting Tom Savini = Perfect.

From Hell - It's really a shame that Alan Moore hates every single movie adaptation of his comic work, because this one isn't half bad. Sure, it's got Johnny Depp . . . again . . . and that chipmunk-toothed Heather Graham, but it's not bad. Stylish and entertaining, and a sort of happy ending, since Depp's character dies at the end (ooops, spoiler, tee-hee) this I don't regret buying. Other Alan Moore adaptations listed here you will see how upset I am with.

Futurama Vol 1 & 2 - Futurama, in many ways, is much better than the Simpsons will ever be. The animation is better, the humor is mature-er and the characters are way more diverse. These two sets are hilarious, and I not only recommend these but the whole series as well.

Now, was that fantastic or what? Yeah, I know . . . it was a load of what.