Shoot 'Em Up Trailer

I like action movies. The more guns and explosions the better. Which is why I'm posting this trailer up for the upcoming film "Shoot'Em Up" which features Clive Owen doing wonderful things with guns, bungees and a somewhat funny scene where he tries to buy bullets with food stamps. They're as good as cash. The trailer also features Paul Giamatti playing the most unlikely hitman yet, and also Monica Belluci, who has to protect a baby and her knockers from being offed by Giamatti's guys. All in all, the movie looks fun. Has the same feel as "Smoking Aces" did earlier this year. I just hope it makes more money and is better received by the American public.


To view this trailer, head out to the IGN website here and either download the trailer (Quicktime recommended) or use one of their streaming formats to watch it. It's up to you.

Brooke Hogan = Ladylike

I guess, that, when your father is Hulk Hogan, wearing jeans that are clearly missing the parts that are supposed to cover your privates, is not that bad actually. I'd rather have her wearing something like this, rather than her going up on stage and actually ripping apart a "Hulkamaniacs" tank top and then supplexing the nearest audience member.

Kim Kardashian's Junk in the Trunk

I'm not quite sure if Kim Kardashian's ploy to become famous through amateur porn came to fruition, but it seems like her next step is to show everyone just how much booty she's got available. From the looks of this picture, the amount is somewhere between ample and "more cushion for the pushin'". That thing looks a little bit on the "out of control" side to me. But hey, if it makes rappers want to (allegedly) piss on her, then more power to her.

Box Office Report - Da Booty

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End - The third PotC movie makes a big splash on the big screen as it takes the top spot for the second time in a row, despite a meteoric drop in proceeds. Still, number one is number one right? Those guys at Disney must be shitting bricks made out of solid gold. But, is the movie any good? I don't know. I refuse to go watch this. Fuck-a-pirates.

Knocked Up - This movie did incredibly well this past weekend during it's opening run, making just under 30 million and nabbing the highest per-screen average of any other movie this past weekend. This bodes well for more Judd Apatow helmed movies, which is good. I'm planning on catching this movie tomorrow. Don't spoil it for me.

Shrek the Third - The green ogre keeps making money for Dreamworks, as the movie crosses the quarter of a billion dollar mark this past weekend. I don't know why parents keep taking their kids to see this movie? It looks terrible. Just how many fart jokes are you willing to subject your progeny to?

Mr. Brooks - This movie I had seen trailers for but it did not really interest me much. Kevin Costner is not a big draw for me. But at least he's not directing this one. Otherwise, it'd be 4+ hours long and instead of being a killer, he'd be an American Indian from the future who is trying to stay afloat in an ocean world . . . while pretending to not be a killer.

Spider-Man 3 - It's the weekend of trilogies. Three out of the top 5 are all #3 movies. This one, the first third picture in a series that I saw, thoroughly disappointed me. I don't care that the CG was some of the best I've seen ever in the Spider-Man franchise. I don't care that it ties up loose ends. It just feels like too much movie which spends its time either showing someone crying or meandering in a direction-less plot that feels like a Kevin Costner directed movie.

Travel-log (6022007-1036)

It's morning on Saturday, the 2nd of June, and we've now been in Utah for a solid 3 days. We're working on our 4th. Spending time with family is fun and all, but the air mattress we've been provided does little for comfort. I'm not complaining though. There's always a price to pay for a good time. But my wife and I can't wait to get back home to our mattress.

Seeing the little ones has been fun as well. My nephew Noah is a hoot. All he likes to do is sneak up on me, smack me on the leg, and then run away while I pretend to not be able to catch him. My niece Caitlin is adorable. She does that to, but she spends more time with my wife because she's her favorite aunt. Then there's Nick and Colton . . . who are just a couple of blond tazmanian devils. But, it's good to see them.

All in all, so far, it's been worth it coming to Utah. There was a time when my wife and I were seriously considering moving here. Now that we've experienced it, we've come to the realization that it's a nice place to visit. Maybe if we hit the lottery (you know, if we ever start playing) we would buy a vacation home out here so we could come and go as we please back to civilization. It's very rural out here. But, if you're ever in Tooele, UT, stop by a place called "Leatherby's". Ice cream sundaes that could put you in a diabetic coma. They're awesome.

We also attended my brother in law's high school graduation. It was held in a barn. Well, actually, it was where they hold the cattle during state fairs, which is technically a barn. It's a good thing his graduating class was not as large as mine, or I would have died. The seating was cramped and uncomfortable, and it felt like it was in the 90's despite air conditioning.

My wife is calling me now. Breakfast and then I'm pretty sure we're going to a couple of little leauge baseball games. We come back to Los Angeles tomorrow. Our backs can't wait.

Travel-log (5302007-03:39)

It's Wednesday morning. Extremely Wednesday morning. I'm trying to shake off about 4 hours of sleep. Yesterday's 11 hour work day is still weighing me down. I think I broke a record yesterday, at least a personal one, when I took over 210 customer service calls in one day. I'll find out when I get back to work in a week. But now, we're on vacation. Why no sleeping in? We have a plane to catch.

Our flight leaves @ 7 AM today, but we need to get to the Burbank airport first, and my wife and I are having my mother chauffer us to the airport. She'll be here in just under an hour. We need to get there early to go through whatever check-in process and security checkpoints there are. It's only a domestic flight, but I haven't actually been on an airplane post 9/11, so I don't know what to expect. This should give us a wide enough berth that we won't miss our flight.

Otherwise, everything is going according to plan. Despite an overwhelming feeling that I am forgetting something, I'm doing OK. I'm sure that whatever is nagging at the back of my mind will finally become clear to me halfway to our destination. It'll be a very "Home Alone(ish)" moment. My wife is getting her decidedly larger suitcase together which has been in the process of packing for the past couple of days. I just hope nothing happens to these bags en route to Utah. I told her already to not put any valuables in them. We're taking those on our carry-on, which is just one messenger bag that is pretty much filled to the gills (if bags had gills) with our iPod Shuffles and digital camera.

Which reminds me . . . I need to empty the porn out of the USB drive so that there aren't any embarrasing moments downloaded into any of our family's computers while were there. That's what I was forgetting. I think. Let's just hope that's all. Got to take care of that. I'll continue travel-logging as possible.

BAFW on Vacation - AKA "Vacations are for Wusses"

Starting tomorrow, I will be gone for about 5 days while I enjoy time away from Los Angeles. It will be a sort of scientific voyage though, as I will spend those five days in the midst of Mormons. Yes, I am going to Utah, and will be in the Salt Lake City vicinity. It'll be kind of like Jane Goodall studying gorillas, but much whiter.

Why am I going to Utah of all places? Well, my wife's family is currently conglomerated in that state. Her oldest sister has been living there for quite some time with her husband and two kids. Her other not so older sister just moved there this past February after her husband got out of the Marines, and they're there with their two kids. My wife's younger brother, who lives with one of the sisters, is graduating from High School this week, so that's the catalyst that initiated this whole trip.

I managed to get five days off while only using 3 vacation days at work, and I didn't even have to trade in sexual favors for that. The days I'm taking off were completely blacked out, but the floor manager told me he appreciated my proactive stance on the issue, letting him know months in advance rather than a week before that I needed this time off. Plus, we had bought the tickets and made these plans way before I even had begun working for my current employer, and the tickets were not refundable. At least I think they're not. Which really helped me in the end, because there's no way I'm wasting 200+ dollars.

So, what does this mean to you? Loyal reader(s?) of "Blogs are for Wusses"? No posts until I return. I don't even know if they have the "internets" in Utah. I've never been there. And no, I won't return with more than one wife. Let me tell you . . . one's enough. So, enjoy whatever Lindsay Lohan does for the next five days and laugh as Paris Hilton begins her stint in jail . . . which should last about a week.

Lindsay Lohan Celebrates Memorial Day Weekend

There's really only one way to commemorate our service-men and their past battles to maintain democracy in the free world if you're Lindsay Lohan. So it's no surprise to me that she was busted for possession and crashed her car into a tree. Didn't you expect something like this to happen? I mean, it's Lindsay Lohan. Sure she's in AA, but she's not in NA, so as far as she knows, cocaine is cool. She just needs to stop drinking. I mean, who's gonna get hurt, right? A tree? Here's what "People" Magazine have in regards to this little incident. Oh, and happy Memorial Day by the way. While you're all enjoying barbeque's, I'll be working.

Lindsay Lohan was arrested and cited for driving under the influence in Los Angeles in the wee hours of Saturday morning, say police, who also found a substance tentatively identified as "a usable amount of cocaine" in connection with the accident.

The 20-year-old actress was slightly injured when her 2005 Mercedes SL-65 convertible struck a curb and shrub on Sunset Boulevard. The car suffered "major damage," according to police.

Lohan and two other people were in the vehicle when it crashed around 5:30 a.m., Lt. Mitch McCann, media relations officer for Beverly Hills police department, said during a press conference Saturday. The star was hospitalized for minor upper chest injuries. The passengers were not hurt.

At the press conference McCann said: "A usable amount of an illegal narcotic tentatively identified as cocaine was recovered and booked." Police would not specify where the drugs were found.

"She was charged with a misdemeanor," said McCann. "There is a potential for additional charges."

Just for the Fuck of It

There's really no news-worthy reason to post pictures of Olivia Munn (from Attack of the Show) dressed as Princess Leah from "Return of the Jedi". If only I were there, I could have been Jabba the Hutt. I would have no qualms with putting on 1000 lbs if I got to have Olivia Munn chained to me permanently. She would, though, end up choking me with the chain . . . like in the movie. Oh no! Spoiler! Sorry. But yeah, below is the full body shot that will send your nerd crotch into spasms of joy. I'm just glad that it wasn't Kevin Pereira in the metal(ish) bikini.

Opening Weekend Movies - 5/24/07

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End - The third movie in the PotC trilogy, the only way to make movies these days it would seem, promises to be action packed with piratey goodness and tons of CG effects . . . which is great if the story were not so ridiculously dragged out. But, unlike the last movie, which resolved nothing, this one might actually wrap things up nicely and finally put the nail in the pirate coffin. But, if this movie does well, and makes "Spider-Man 3" like opening numbers, expect to see "Pirates of the Caribbean: Sneaking into your Wallets" in 2010.

Bug - The other movie that opens this weekend is a bit more on the interesting side. It stars Ashley Judd as a woman that begins to become paranoid that bugs are crawling underneath her skin. Also notable . . . not a single pirate character in the movie. That should be a plus for anyone that is burnt out on that stuff. This sounds like a very interesting movie. Too bad I won't go watch it. A few factors come into play as to why I won't go watch this. One, I'm working straight through Tuesday. Two, the price of movie tickets does not justify going to watch a movie unless I really really really want to see it. And three, we're in save money mode for our upcoming vacation in 5 days.

Indie Recommendation

Paprika - This movie is opening up in selected theaters. A few months ago I posted a rather impressive trailer for this Anime film. You should go watch it. I know that the plot involving a dream detective trying to track down someone who is using a device to invade people's dreams sounds ludicrous, but the animation looks gorgeous and you can almost guarantee plenty of seats available. Check out your local indie theater and enjoy this visual experience.

No One Likes a Fatty

Um . . . is this woman the devil? This MeMe Roth woman who says that Jordin Sparks, the contestant of American Idol, should not have won because she's fat. But, in the end, America embraced the chance of diabetes over the chance of endless white-boy beat-boxing. It's almost like choosing a BK Whopper over a tofu-burger. I would have (if I watched the show) made the same decision America.

Debt Collector Vs. Judge Judy

I don't have much sympathy for debt collectors, and I've worked for the collections dept of Earthlink Internet in the past. Sure, at the time I was just trying to collect 2 months past due internet service, as opposed to a payday loan which is what this douchebag was trying to collect on when he called the wrong number and ran face first into this Judge Judy soundboard. Oh, and by the way . . . never ever ever go to one of those payday advance places. I work with a bank now in customer service, and you would not believe the horror stories I've come across that involve these types of businesses. Anyway, enjoy the 10 minutes or so of this video. Sure, you have to endure the intensely annoying and shrill voice that is being used to keep the debt collector on his toes, but it's for a good cause?

Trailers Cubed

I've got three trailers for you today. One, looks awesome. The other, could be awesome. And the third, is downright evil.


This first trailer is for the "Golden Compass" movie coming out soon. It's fantasy much like "The Lord of the Rings" was, but even more fantastical. It's got Daniel Craig in it, along with Nicole Kidman, Eva Green, and Sam Elliot as a cowboy. Hmm, that's a stretch. Oh, it also has talking polar bears, which almost guarantees that my wife will want to watch it.


This next trailer is for FOX's new Terminator hour-long drama debuting this fall. It's called "The Sarah Connor Chronicles", and it stars Lena Heady (the Spartan queen from "300"), some kid as John Connor, and Summer Glau as a terminator. It might be OK, but I know that if I start watching it, and enjoying it, FOX, will just pull the plug on it like every other show I've loved on FOX.


This next trailer comes from MTV, who decided it would be a great idea to make "My Super Sweet 16" into a movie. Fuck them. That's all I have to say about that.

John Rambo Footage

This is not so much a trailer as it is a selection of scenes that "Aintitcool.com" was able to get from Sylvester Stallone's next resurrection project, "John Rambo". I know it's not the trailer because there's enough gore and almost rape in it that would not be shown during a trailer reel for any of the summer blockbuster movies slated for release. Although, I could see it as a pre-cursor to a "Grindhouse" type of movie. It does have that feel. Specially that scene where he lops of the dude's head on the mounted machine gun on the Jeep, and then he turns it on the driver, and makes quite the mess. I did not watch Stallone's latest "Rocky" movie, but seeing this now, I might rethink that and actually record it whenever it hits HBO or Showtime.

Search Terms - Sunday Searching

Google is back in the search results, and as you can see, the difference is massive. I'll let the searching do the talking.

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jessica simpson areolas - MSN Live Search
Kate Bosworth nipples - Google Search
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superbad r-rated trailer - Google Search
Bianca Gascoigne beaver shot UK - Eurekster Search
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kim kardashian clip - BlogSearch
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Sienna Miller - Technorati Search
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"Fall Out Boy Screencaps" - Dogpile Search
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Opening Weekend Movies - 5/18/07

Shrek the 3rd - More like "Opening Weekend Movie", as this is pretty much the only thing that opens this weekend in a wide release. Screw you independent films. You won't stand a chance at beating this family movie juggernaut. It will make a bazillion dollars. Most likely will take the #1 spot away from "Spider-Man 3", which hardly deserves it. Remember, if this movie does well, you're just planting the seeds for "Shrek 4", which means, you're doing it to yourself America. You sick masochistic fucks.

New Transformers Trailer

I had some concerns when I heard that they were making a Transformers movie. It could end up being extremely cheesy or just downright suck-tackular. From the look of the trailers, it's looking like neither, and rather looking pretty fucking awesome. I'm definitely going to go watch this movie on the 4th of July. You should too. It's your patriotic duty to support the most successful American export to the world . . . movies.

Network Execs Mightier than A-Bombs

CBS network executives have passed on renewing "Jericho" for the fall 2007 television season. This is an outrage (well, that maybe a little strong) as this is hands down their best show on their line up. I don't usually get behind causes, mainly due to lazyness, but check out the link below and sign the petition to save this show. I don't care if their air the 2nd season on Saturdays at midnight. I'm still going to record it.

Sign the save "Jericho" petition here

Zach Galifianakis is Uncomfortable

You know, I would have done the same thing. If I were in a studio full of "Ellen" audience members, I might not have been able to keep my composure as well as Zach did. I actually would have broken down and cowered on the floor, all the while, throwing my feces at the crowd. I don't think I've seen a scarier thing this whole week, and I went to watch "28 Weeks Later" on Tuesday.

Mischa Barton Slips the Whole Boob

I'm pretty sure that most shirts were designed with the intent of covering what is underneath. You know, against the elements of nature, public decency and the such. But, Mischa Barton must not adhere to those arcane shirt-rules, because the shirts she wears just don't cover up anything. That one she's wearing in these pictures looks like it was made out of torn up toilet paper. While the concept might be imaginative, it proves to be less than practical, as you can clearly see pretty much her whole boob. Whatever happened to providing a little mystery to what may lay under the clothes? I guess that's an antiquated concept these days. Next thing you know, Mischa Barton will run around with a can of soup on her head and nothing else. Why? Because it's fashionable.