Monday, October 15, 2007

Tyler Perry's Box Office Report

Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married? - The better question should be . . . why does Tyler Perry stick his name in front of everything he does. I'm pretty sure he takes a shit, and then names it "Tyler Perry's Bowel Movement" and it's released concurrently on DVD and the big screen and it makes 21 million bucks just like this turd of a movie. Which, by the way, I'm pretty sure was already released as I saw a straight to DVD title called "Why Did I Get Married" with Tyler Perry's name already slapped across it. That one didn't have Janet Jackson in it. So, technically, the man is re-making his own movies. This movie should be accurately titled "Tyler Perry's Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married". Have I said Tyler Perry enough already.

Tyler Perry.

The Game Plan - I like Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in movies. Way more than I ever liked his wrestling persona. But, this kiddie-themed movie just looks retarded. And the whole "I'm a single, rich guy with a perfect life until my long lost daughter shows up and turns everything upside down until I realize that I prefer my life upside down and I can't live without her" genre feels old and tired. I'm passing up on this, and it seems a lot of people passed this up this past weekend as well as they went to see that Tyler Perry movie.

Tyler Perry.

Michael Clayton - This movie has the most boring name ever. If it had, maybe a "Tyler Perry's" in front of it, it could have made a little more money. But I guess this movie is too important for that. This movie is trying to appeal to my inner 50 year old, which would be totally into this movie. But, my inner 50 year old is currently under house arrest, for making me watch "Beaches" the other night. Fucking subconscious bastard.

Tyler Perry.

We Own The Night - Someone at work told me this movie was good. He also told me that he willingly purchased "The Punisher" on Blu-Ray . . . so, umm . . . taking it with a grain of salt here. But, it does have a couple of cool actors in it. But I'm pretty sure that my period piece money is going to the upcoming "American Gangster" movie coming out later this year (or month, I don't even know when that comes out really).

Tyler Perry.

The Heartbreak Kid - There was a time that I would have been very much into a Ben Stiller movie. What happened? He used to be funny . . . right? But, lately, anything he does seems to be some sort of lame rom-com with fart/queef jokes and I'm pretty sure I've evolved past that. Doesn't mean I might not catch it when it hits cable, but I'm not going to make an active effort to pay 10 bucks to go see something like this. Specially when it doesn't have Tyler Perry's name in front of it. Fuck that.

Tyler Perry.

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