Musically Inclined Mondays - Charlotte Hatherly

Behave
Not many people might know about Charlotte Hatherly. I didn't before this morning, which is why this musical discovery is so cool. I was just going through some geek websites, picking up information on "Grindhouse" which is being released this year. I was reading how Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead director) was directing one of the fake trailers that would be running between the two films from Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez. Then, I read something about this particular singer's video being directed by Edgar Wright's brother, Oscar Wright and how it was actually Edgar Wright's girlfriend. Since I'm a big "Shaun of the Dead" fan, I thought I'd check it out just for the hell of it. Turns out the song isn't bad, and the video is pretty cool as well. Check it out, and seek her music out. Below is another video, titled "Bastardo", which is a bit on the pop'y side, but has a cameo by Simon Pegg, also of "Shaun of the Dead" fame.

Bastardo

Girl Fight Fridays - Where's my Strap-on?

That's pretty much the only thing this girl fight is missing. Come on ladies, who goes on Spring Break without packing their strap-on dildo? You never know when you're going to end up in a fake mud-wrestling match, perched over another bikini'd chick, dry humping her while you're trying to choke her. Right around that time, a bolted on phallus would have come in handy. Just my own personal opinion though. I mean, a man can dream right?

Mary-Kate finally a Zombie

Mary-Kate Olsen, part of the Olsen Twins megalo-ginormous-empire, and the one with the "alleged" eating disorder, is pictured above, trying to nibble a snack off the calf of a rather low-rent looking stripper. I guess we can now know just why she's dropped to 80 lbs of bone and ligaments . . . It's hard to find a stripper that will let you take a chunk off her leg. And since that appears to be Mary-Kate's only source of sustenance, I can see how she got so thin. On the plus side, if you don't mind the crabs, the consumption of strippers is high in protein. So, if she could eat three square exotic dancers a day, she'd look much more healthy that what she looks like now.

Getting Sick Sucks

I've been under the weather for the past couple of days. It all started Tuesday evening, when I felt a pin-prick of pain in the back of my throat. Wednesday morning, it was a full blown sore throat. Even though, I washed up and headed to work. Thought I'd pop a couple of DayQuil's and man-up. Around noon, the mucus was free-flowing from my nose. There was nothing I could do to stop it. I was excused from work, and headed home. There, I was laid up pretty much most of the day. Which is not the best position when you have a nose that is constantly running. Eventually, I dragged my ass to the couch and played some "Marvel Ultimate Alliance" on the X Box 360. Sitting up actually made my nose feel better. Videogames do have curative powers.

That night I spent tossing and turning. I could not get rest, even with the NyQuil and the Tylenol Severe Cold medicine my wife ran out to get at around midnight for me (she's a saint). Somehow, I drifted off to sleep, waking up a couple of times during the night to hock some mighty disgusting luggies that almost made me vomit. Every time I swallowed, I swallowed phlegm.

Thursday morning came around, and while the mucus had pretty much solidified in my nose, now I felt like there was a mass of hard bronchial phlegm blocking my esophagus. I phoned work, and while I was giving the receptionist the bad news, I couldn't help but notice that I sounded akin to an 80 year old woman on 2 packs of unfiltered Malboro reds a day. Or . . . Tara Reid. That kind of raspy sounding voice. So, I found some generic Tussin in the cupboard and took that, along with some more DayQuil, and tried to get some more bed-rest.

I started to feel better later that day. I didn't have that pressure in the middle of my chest and my sinuses did not feel like they were close to the point of exploding. So, today, Friday, I make it to work. While the mucus is not free-flowing like a couple of days ago, it does make it hard to talk on the phone. I'm utterly congested, and my voice keeps cracking like a 14 year old going through puberty. That, and I keep coughing up hard, green, guacamole-looking chunks of phlegm. So, I've been trying to handle mainly e-mails, because that way I don't have to hit the mute button every couple of seconds so that the client doesn't hear me trying to handle my coughing and snorting to clear my nasal passages.

Hopefully, I will start feeling better sometime during the weekend. Next week promises to be fairly interesting. A change of schedule and a new opportunity might be coming my way. I don't want to talk about it too much. I tend to jinx myself. I'll keep you posted.

The Hills Have Eyes Again

I loved the remake of "The Hills Have Eyes". You can see my gushing review of that here. I had heard that there was going to be a second movie, further extending the story. Well, here's the trailer for that. I hope that the quality carries over into the next entry in the series, that finds some National Guards(wo)men encountering some radioactive freaks in the desert.

Excessive Force

I don't know what the problem with Glendale is when it comes to their Police force . . . but it seems like they enjoy breaking out the big guns just for the hell of it. I live in the city adjacent to Glendale, and we barely ever see cops. Mainly because we're under LAPD jurisdiction, but that's a different story. Glendale, having its own police force, seems to be out in force all the time. And it looks like they take their jobs a little too seriously.

Case in point. A couple of weeks ago, I'm walking to my usual sandwhich shop to pick up a turkey/bacon/avocado on wheat, when I notice that across the street, there are 5 motorcycle cops, engaging in police activity. "Who were they pulling over?" you might be asking yourself. "Was it some sort of GTA-esque chase?" I really hope so. Because these 5 cops, on fully decked out police motorcycles, had just pulled over a Mexican on a bicycle. I wish I could have taken a picture, but just as I whipped out my cellphone camera, they let the Mexican go on his way. I guess he wasn't the "Coyote" they were looking for. It's hard to hide illegal immigrants in a bike-basket.

Then, today, during my walk to lunch (same lunch location), I see a couple of cop cars and an armored-looking truck. Once again, I'm wondering if they're apprehending a terrorist cell that was just busted up at the Greek restaurant they were parked outside of. Nah, nothing that noteworthy. It was just some guy, with a backpack. It would seem that, usually, it would only take a cop car unit to handle this type of "threat" . . . but not in Glendale, where the motto must be "To Protect and to Serve . . . to the Xtreme!"

And this is not solely relegated to daily copy duties on the beat. My wife and I saw a convoy of motorcycles and cop car, full lights ablaze, going down one of Glendale's main thoroughfares (Colorado Blvd). You'd think they'd be escorting a foreign dignitary or maybe a President. Nah, it was one of the fucking Rose Parade floats. And not even a particularly good looking one. I would have understood if it was one of the Star Wars ones. My wife commented that this might have freaked her out if she had been in a different state of mind at the time. I'm glad she's put that stuff behind her. But, secretly, deep inside, I was kind of freaking out myself. Not due to paranoia. But due to the sheer amount of ridiculousness that the GPD exerts on a daily basis.

Happy (?) New Year

Yeah, I've been lagging on the posting lately. Why? Who cares. It's the end of the year. I should have some soft of "Best of" list, but lists are teh suck. Or teh gh3y. I'm not quite sure which. Enjoy the last days of 2006 bitches . . . 'cause you'll never get them back.

Fantastic Four: The Rise of the Silver Surfer Teaser

Can it be? An actual teaser trailer for a movie that I was not particularly awaiting with open arms that has changed my mind. Completely? I was not a big fan of the first "Fantastic Four" movie. But, there is more great action in this minute and a half of footage than in the whole running time of the first movie. So, maybe this will improve on the previous cinematic incarnation. Or, this could be the only good scene in 2 hours worth of crap. Either way, it kicks all sorts of ass. And the Silver Surfer looks pretty damn cool.



Prepare to be amazed here if you have Quicktime. If not, then you suck as much as the first "Fantastic Four" movie.

E-mail and Grievances

I got an e-mail today at work from a coworker who happens to read my blog. He/she (to maintain anonymity) took offense to a comment that was on a post that was directed towards someone else that I work with . . . a certain PC doctor's (or candy-striper if you ask me) whose then absence from work for a prolonged period of time due to "illness" was causing me a lot of stress. I think I had made a mention that his juniors were not working as hard as they should, and then I got this e-mail in my inbox today.

Jaime, if you have something to say about me or my work ethics, please take it up with me and my manager and not the entire world on your blog. I don’t appreciate being called names or being slandered on someone’s blog.

Now, here's the comment that he/she is having a problem with.

(G)et your ass to work. Your wonder twins are not doing a lick of work. They keep taking breaks to go to liquor stores and/or coffee shops with their BFF's.

A couple of things that I'm having a problem with here. Sure, I called him/her a "Wonder Twin" . . . but not which one? Maybe it was the one that turns into a bear or an eagle instead of the one that turns into a bucket of water or a letter opener. Secondly, the entire world is going to be looking at this? That might be a little bit of an exaggeration. Even if someone from Germany were to happen upon that particular blog post, they wouldn't even care because it's not a post about shize-movies starring a drunk Hermione from the Harry Potter movies. So, relax, the whole world is not in on it. Thirdly, the guy the post was directed to is your direct superior, so . . . in a round-a-bout way, I was taking it up with your "manager". And lastly (I'm pretty sure that's a word) . . . I don't mention any names, so how are you being "slandered" if no one knows it's you. And how do you know that I am talking to you now. It could be . . . someone else. That's the beauty of anonymity. I respect your desire to not be "slandered", but who's going to know it's you . . . unless you see something in that comment that has some semblance of truth.

Get over it. I don't see Britney Spears getting pissed off at the fact that I posted her upskirts on my blog. If you want to be mad at me, then go ahead. It doesn't bother me. But realize that I don't make shit up. I speak, or in this case, type my opinions that are based on some fact. I'm not going to make a big deal about this. I'm going to let it go. I don't want to keep having to use my 15 minute breaks to post explanations as to why I do the things that I do. You're an OK guy/girl. But I'm not apologizing for what I type.

Christmas Loot

Christmas speaks to my materialistic side. I don't have a problem getting presents. I love them actually. This year, my wife and I set up a budget so that we wouldn't get into too much trouble with bills and the such. Here's what I got.

Reading Material - She sure knows what I like. She got me all 4 Halo novels and a couple of trade paperback comic books (100 Bullets vol 9 & Fables vol 7). I have already gone through the comic books, because I'm a bit of a nerd. The books I will begin soon.

Viewing Material - Superman Returns (Widescreen), V for Vendetta (Widescreen) and Lucky Number Slevin (Widescreen) DVD's. The first two I had seen, and she got for me because they were comic book movies. The third one is something I wanted to watch but never got around to because of time constraints and/or monetary issues. But, now I have a chance to watch it. It looks good.

Wearing Material - Boxer briefs (cause I like it snug) and crew socks (no tubes for me) and a t-shirt with John Cleese and a famous quote from a Monty Python movie. Some warm gloves were also given to me as part of my stocking stuffer.

High-Tech Toys - An X-Box Live Vision Camera, a wireless 360 Controller with a Play and Charge kit and a 1 Gig USB thumb-drive. Pretty much everything I hinted at for the past couple of months.

Stocking Stuffers - This was my first year of doing stockings . . . and I failed miserably at it. My wife, an accomplished pro at it, did much better. A couple of the things listed above were put in my stocking, but in addition to that, a few pounds (yes . . . pounds/lbs) of chocolate and other candies, a little Buddha organizer and a card game.

So, while I didn't get any flat screen televisions and the such, I think I did pretty well. I got some gift cards and cash/checks from other family members which helped me buy "Gears of War" yesterday. I still have some cash left behind from that. I might go out and buy me a fancy electric razor. They one I have is dying on me. Not sure what else I might buy myself, but I know for sure I'm going to let the malls die down a little before venturing into them. While I like sales, I don't like the crowds that will be swarming consumer establishments around this time of the year.

Girl Fight Fridays - Have a Muddy X-Mas

While there is no malice and wishes of clawing another bitch's eyes out in this video, you can't deny the inherent fun that is watching two bikini'ed chicks rolling around in the mud. Why don't they show this on prime-time television? It would be more popular than Lost or Desperate Housewives. Not as touching as Extreme Make-Over: Home Edition . . . in the heart dept . . . but definitely more touching in the groin-area.

Calling all Mac-Addicts - iPhone?

While I'm not big on cell-phones (why do they work everywhere except your own home?!), this leaked, potential design for the long-rumored iPhone is intriguing. I mean, no buttons? Is it as big as a Nano? What gives? It looks much nicer than my current LG cellphone, but just how much is Apple expecting its rabid fan-base (I include myself in that category) to pay for this? So many questions. I'll be making a phone call this weekend. Part wishing someone a merry X-mas, and part information gathering.

The Donald Throws Down . . .Verbally

Mental note - Never get into an argument with Donald Trump. His hair . . . brilliant. His business practices . . . outstanding. His choice to keep Miss Universe on the job . . . commendable. Watch your (fat)back Rosie O'Donnell. He's coming for you.

Bonus?

A couple of minutes ago, as I was plucking away at e-mails from customers who can't figure out just how to make their computers work with their anti-virus program(s), I heard some "thank you's" and some "great work this past week". A group of higher-ups was walking around the dept, stopping at each mini-cubicle that we inhabit for 8 hours of the day, and giving something to the tech support employees. I'm thinking that it's got to be something not sucky. Maybe a small token of their appreciation for a year's worth of hard work and triumph over adversity time and time again.

When they got to me, I had no idea just how small that token was to be. Five Dollars. American. Five 1 Dollar bills were handed to me, by the manager of our entire division, with a big smile on her face, and then she thanked me for a great job. I looked at her, and holding back, using every little bit of restraint possessed by my being, I uttered the words "thank you". They went on to the next lucky individual and I sat there, on my chair, looking at this money that was just handed to me.

As soon as they left our office, everyone pretty much looked at each other and either started laughing, or started making jokes about how they'd hit the big time. I personally made a crack at how I can send my (non-existent) kids to college now. I mean, it is 5 dollars. This gesture symbolizes just how out of touch this company is with their employee-base. We do our work every day, for pay that is not equal to the amount of effort that we put into it . . . and this is what they do? Forget about approving the raises everyone that got a promotion should have gotten a couple of months ago. No, we're giving you poor, downtrodden motherfuckers 5 dollars . . . so you can almost buy yourself a lunch today.

Gee, thanks. I'll try not to spend it all in one place.

One of Those Days . . . . Again

You know, as the week progresses, my thoughts of murder keep getting more prevalent. I swear I could kill someone right now. Might be you. Watch your back. But seriously, why do I keep talking to the same morons. Customers that just don't get the "NO FREE PHONE SUPPORT" that is in their service agreements. Customers that when asked "Can I have your client number", they respond with "Do you mean my user name/password/social security number/height & weight/size of my last bowel movement?" NO MOTHERFUCKER! Your client number. I am speaking fucking Chinese? Do I look like Rosie O'Donnell. I could have sworn there were no "Ching-chongs" in my question to you . . . fuck-hole.

And it's only Wednesday. It doesn't get any better than this until the weekend, which is still a painful 2 days away. I'm not sure I can make it. I've felt like this before, and I have been able to make it, but today . . . I'm not so sure. While I'm typing this I can see the phone queue keep accumulating calls. And I know that every single one of those calls will be some stupid motherfucker that has no business anywhere within 100 yards from a computer. These people truly need take a trip back in time and hang out with Neanderthals . . . because spending some time with their intellectual equals might be a welcome change of pace for them. I know it would be a welcome change of pace for me . . . because I wouldn't have to deal with them anymore.

*Sigh* Rant over. Jaime has been fully vented. Anger levels dissipating . . . but they're still there. Next call determines wether I kill one of the wonder twins or not.

Early Halo 3 Footage

I was just cruising around the Gamespot website and I came across a link that said something about some behind the scenes video from Bungie. I thought it'd some boring technical discussion on how they're pretty'ing up the next Halo game. Then, as I was watching it, I started getting interested in how they are reworking the Brutes, and then they show some pre-liminary animations of how the behave and they follow it up with early footage of the Master Chief taking them on. Just check out the video here and then curse yourself in anticipation of this because we probably won't see a release of this game until Fall of 2007.

New Transformers Trailer

Holy shit. Micheal Bay just blew my mind. I don't know if there's much that I can say here about this trailer. Other than it kicks copious amounts of ass. Metallic ass, which is the hardest of asses to kick. I'm still trying to pick up my jaw off the floor. More than meets the eye here

Britney Spears - Fathead

Do you all remember when Britney Spears was attractive? I remember those days fondly. Back when Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears would battle for my masturbatory actions. Sigh . . . good times. But now, Britney's looking like this, and Aguilera looks like a whorish Betty Boop. I guess change is bad. The funny thing about this though, is that I'm not alone in not liking the new Britney Spears. These pictures are from a Laker's game she went to, where the crowd, after seeing her visage grace the Jumbotron, boo'ed her and she actually got up and left the game. That's grand. I would have gotten over my hate of organized sporting events if I had been in attendance, as I would have, and gleefully, joined in on the public boo'ing. One more picture below. Despite her fat-head, the cans are looking decent.

I hope that's a diet Pepsi, tubby

TuGMO - Beer is a Gateway Drug

A gateway to girls macking like there's no tomorrow. Look at these two go. I love it how beer always leads to either one of these results. The chicks either want to claw each other's eyes out, or they want to love and grind each other. There's no in the middle when chicks drink.

BAFW - Truant Officer Edition

You know who you are. You cocksucker. You're not at work and we're all paying for it. And on a Tuesday when you know we're understaffed already. What the hell kind of a "team-player" are you? And even though you take 1 call per hour because of your fondness of remoting into a customer's computer, that doesn't mean that our workload is light. We're fucking dying over here. And tomorrow, you'll stroll in at noon (if you do decide to show up) and smile at us and joke around like the last couple of days never happened.

You know what . . . Fuck you. And your PC doctoring ways. Don't even ask me to plug your site on my blog mofo. God I'm so pissed off. Here's a New Year's resolution for you. Show up to work more often.

Unless your intestines are leaking again. In that case, get well soon. But that's the only reason why I would show any degree of sympathy towards you. We're stuck here breathing the poisonous mold. So should you. Jack-hole.