Spider-Man 3 - Despite a $100 million drop-off in business this weekend, as opposed to the last weekend, this movie still takes the top spot making just under $60 million, proving that people don't read reviews anymore and they like to be subjected to long, drawn-out melodrama sandwiched in between CGI fight scenes. I did not enjoy this movie. It wasn't terrible . . . but there's just so much missed potential.
28 Weeks Later - Zombie movies don't usually end up this high on the list, but just like it's predecessor, this movie is a bit of a small hit. I hear good things about this movie. Analog Medium has a review of it if you're thinking about watching it and haven't made a decision yet. I didn't read the whole thing, because I want to keep myself spoiler free for this one. So, be careful. And you can check out their growing "Encyclopedia Zombica", which keeps growing as they keep watching pretty much every single zombie movie ever made. Those guys are kah-razy.
Georgia Rule - Snooze. Why do women watch this type of crap? It stars three old broads dealing with love. Didn't "Golden Girls" tackle this subject in the early 90's? Or was it the late 80's? And before you say "Wait, it's two old broads and a young one", consider how old and tired Lindsay Lohan is looking these days. Plus, when did her voice get that raspy? She sounds like my grandma on three packs a day. And my grandma is dead. It's that bad.
Disturbia - The "Cult of LeBouef" continues to pump fresh money into this movie, which has outperformed my expectations. Everything this kid touches turns into tween gold. No wonder they got him for the "Transformers" movie. That flick's gonna make tons of cash just on the LeBouef-factor. Fuck the robots in disguise, I just want my "Even Stevens" fix.
Delta Farce - Seriously America? A Larry the Cable Guy movie in the top five? Shouldn't you all be at Wal-Mart of K-Mart, buying denim suits and getting your mullets coiffed? What the fuck is wrong with you? Maybe the terrorists were right. Maybe America is indeed evil.
Showing posts with label Disturbia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Disturbia. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Monday, May 07, 2007
Box Office Report - My Money Sense is Tingling
Spider-Man 3 - So, this movie made a ton of money this past weekend, and also broke a record set by some pirate movie last year. The third outing in the Spider-Man franchise brought in an unprecedented $148 million to Sony Pictures . . . and the executives at that movie studio are rolling in money like pigs in shit. Did I watch it this past weekend? No. Don't tell me what happens. I'm waiting until it hits the 2 for 1 theater in Pasadena. 5 bucks ya'll. Or maybe I'll see it next weekend, where it will make another trillion dollars.
Disturbia - For 2 weeks in a row, this movie was number one. But it couldn't contend with the box office juggernaut that is the movie currently holding the top spot. But, is this movie good? Who knows. It's got that LaBouef kid. He's charismatic-ish? I'm not going to watch this. Why? Well, I don't watch the Disney Channel and I'm not a tween girl.
Fracture - This movie actually moved up one spot in the top five. Not many movies do that. But then again, it only $3 million this weekend. A bit anemic wouldn't you say? Which is why it gets an anemic entry.
The Invisible - The next few sentences will be written in invisible ink.
Next - So, Nick Cage? What new hairstyle will you be sporting for your next box office disaster? Mullet? Jerry-Curl? Whi-fro?
Disturbia - For 2 weeks in a row, this movie was number one. But it couldn't contend with the box office juggernaut that is the movie currently holding the top spot. But, is this movie good? Who knows. It's got that LaBouef kid. He's charismatic-ish? I'm not going to watch this. Why? Well, I don't watch the Disney Channel and I'm not a tween girl.
Fracture - This movie actually moved up one spot in the top five. Not many movies do that. But then again, it only $3 million this weekend. A bit anemic wouldn't you say? Which is why it gets an anemic entry.
The Invisible - The next few sentences will be written in invisible ink.
Next - So, Nick Cage? What new hairstyle will you be sporting for your next box office disaster? Mullet? Jerry-Curl? Whi-fro?
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Box Office Report - Didn't See it Coming
Disturbia - Never underestimate the pull that Shia LeBoef has with the tween crowd. I mean, who cares about him other than all the "Even Stevens" fans who keep watching those re-runs on the Disney Channel. Sure, he's an OK actor. But enough to keep this movie at #1 for two weeks straight? I don't think so. America and I are not on speaking terms right now.
The Invisible - Guess no one was either interested in this or people are just saving up for next weekend, when the first major blockbuster of the year should be released. This rather forgettable mystery was, indeed, invisible to viewers who passed this up.
Next - Nick Cage. When will you learn that it's not the weird haircuts that you sport in your movies that draws in the crowds, but rather the caliber of the stories you're acting in. Take some time to re-evaluate your career man. When a big "action" movie opens up with just over 7 million, that's not even enough to pay for the advertising campaign. I guess he didn't see this coming. Haha, get it, because the movie is about a guy that can see into the future. *sigh* Why do I have to explain myself to you people.
Fracture - Yawn. Isn't it Anthony Hopkins' nap time? Someone get him his puree'd steak and potatoes and an extra thick straw. The man has to watch his "Matlock" for crying outloud.
Blades of Glory - It should be a crime for a movie that looks as ridiculous as this to make over 100 million dollars. But there's no denying the allure of Will Ferrell. That motherfucker's funny. But is he really 100 million dollars funny? I guess America has decided that already.
Special #6 Entry
Hot Fuzz - This movie is performing alright despite the fact that it has those silly English accents and it's been ignored by pretty much the whole of the mainstream American public. We watched this the weekend it opened and had a great time. You should really take your time to find this movie and watch it in the theaters. By the power of Greyskull . . . .
The Invisible - Guess no one was either interested in this or people are just saving up for next weekend, when the first major blockbuster of the year should be released. This rather forgettable mystery was, indeed, invisible to viewers who passed this up.
Next - Nick Cage. When will you learn that it's not the weird haircuts that you sport in your movies that draws in the crowds, but rather the caliber of the stories you're acting in. Take some time to re-evaluate your career man. When a big "action" movie opens up with just over 7 million, that's not even enough to pay for the advertising campaign. I guess he didn't see this coming. Haha, get it, because the movie is about a guy that can see into the future. *sigh* Why do I have to explain myself to you people.
Fracture - Yawn. Isn't it Anthony Hopkins' nap time? Someone get him his puree'd steak and potatoes and an extra thick straw. The man has to watch his "Matlock" for crying outloud.
Blades of Glory - It should be a crime for a movie that looks as ridiculous as this to make over 100 million dollars. But there's no denying the allure of Will Ferrell. That motherfucker's funny. But is he really 100 million dollars funny? I guess America has decided that already.
Special #6 Entry
Hot Fuzz - This movie is performing alright despite the fact that it has those silly English accents and it's been ignored by pretty much the whole of the mainstream American public. We watched this the weekend it opened and had a great time. You should really take your time to find this movie and watch it in the theaters. By the power of Greyskull . . . .
Monday, April 16, 2007
Box Office Report - Disturbing
Disturbia - The number one movie in the country is a somewhat unofficial remake of a Christopher Reeves starring remake of a Hitchcock'ian classic? There is nothing original anymore. But, at least it knocks down the reigning Will Ferrell movie du jour, so it can't be all that bad.
Blades of Glory - Former top spot box office dominator gets knocked down a peg, but it still doesn't hurt its numbers. Are there really no other movies to watch that this movie still rakes in a considerable amount of dough? I mean, making 14 million this time of the year, is like having a so-so opening weekend take. But this movie has been around for a solid 3 weeks. And you all could have gone to watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
Meet the Robinsons - I have not met the Robinsons, nor do I want to meet them. I'm pretty tired of the Chicken Littles and other Pixar knock-offs. Disney, give it a rest. You're looking a little on the desperate side. Like a girlfriend that would give up the poop-chute just so that her on the verge of leaving boyfriend sticks around for maybe another couple of nights. Seriously, retain your dignity.
Perfect Stranger - Halle Berry has an Oscar right? Bruce Willis is a pretty good action movie actor . . . so, what are they both doing in this piece of crap movie that should have gone straight to video? The answer to that would be as complicated as trying to explain to your dog that it shouldn't pee on your carpets. No matter how much you try to reason with it, there will still be a pet-stain on your rug by the end of the day.
Are We Done Yet? - This movie has a question mark in it's title, which really should be a question unto it's own. And what is that question? Why the hell would you drag your kids to this movie? Do you really want them to shut up for an hour and a half that bad? Didn't child services warn you about child-abuse already? God, kids have it rough these days.
Oh, and in case you were wondering, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters came in at #13 with a profitable 3 million take. Which, is pretty good considering it opening in limited release, and the budget for it must not have passed the $100,000 mark. Trust me, I watched it this weekend. While it was the definition of "random", it wasn't high-budget material. Thoroughly enjoyable though. I think this will make some decent cash on DVD.
Blades of Glory - Former top spot box office dominator gets knocked down a peg, but it still doesn't hurt its numbers. Are there really no other movies to watch that this movie still rakes in a considerable amount of dough? I mean, making 14 million this time of the year, is like having a so-so opening weekend take. But this movie has been around for a solid 3 weeks. And you all could have gone to watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
Meet the Robinsons - I have not met the Robinsons, nor do I want to meet them. I'm pretty tired of the Chicken Littles and other Pixar knock-offs. Disney, give it a rest. You're looking a little on the desperate side. Like a girlfriend that would give up the poop-chute just so that her on the verge of leaving boyfriend sticks around for maybe another couple of nights. Seriously, retain your dignity.
Perfect Stranger - Halle Berry has an Oscar right? Bruce Willis is a pretty good action movie actor . . . so, what are they both doing in this piece of crap movie that should have gone straight to video? The answer to that would be as complicated as trying to explain to your dog that it shouldn't pee on your carpets. No matter how much you try to reason with it, there will still be a pet-stain on your rug by the end of the day.
Are We Done Yet? - This movie has a question mark in it's title, which really should be a question unto it's own. And what is that question? Why the hell would you drag your kids to this movie? Do you really want them to shut up for an hour and a half that bad? Didn't child services warn you about child-abuse already? God, kids have it rough these days.
Oh, and in case you were wondering, Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters came in at #13 with a profitable 3 million take. Which, is pretty good considering it opening in limited release, and the budget for it must not have passed the $100,000 mark. Trust me, I watched it this weekend. While it was the definition of "random", it wasn't high-budget material. Thoroughly enjoyable though. I think this will make some decent cash on DVD.
Friday, April 13, 2007
Opening Weekend Movies - 4/13/07
Disturbia - Shia LeBouf stars in this movie, which I'm pretty sure is a Hitchcock movie remake, but instead of the main character being immobilized by a broken leg in a cast, he's under house arrest and has a tracking device on his leg. That, and everyone is young. Except for the killer. Because killers are always old, and tend to give Dr. House a terrible time if he leaves a thermometer up their ass.
Pathfinder - Vikings discovered America way before Christopher Columbus stumbled upon the Caribbean on his way to Asia. This would make "Pathfinder" a documentary then. Which I'm just guessing won't make as much money because Karl Urban is not Al Gore or Michael Moore. But, wouldn't this movie be that much better if you could see either one of those don viking armor and start going medieval on some asses? Yeah, why doesn't Hollywood get all their ideas from me.
Perfect Stranger - Halle Berry works in an ad agency as a mousy office worker who finds out her boss is evil. Wasn't this the plot for "Catwoman" as well? Berry just got her star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. I'm wondering if it's for "Most retarded movie roles after winning an Oscar" category.
Redline - Eddie Griffin crashed a fake Ferrari to promote this movie. So you know it has to be good. Cars and racing . . . and I'm guessing chicks? Is this the next installment in the Fast and the Furious franchise? "Fast and the Furious - European Extreme"? Who cares. If this makes money (2nd or 3rd in the top five) this weekend, I'm taking a sledgehammer to the next Lamborghini I see.
Slow Burn - Never heard of it. Could be possibly good, or possibly bad. With a name like that, and starring Ray Liotta, it could just be a movie about something . . . burning slowly. The synopsis I read said something about a gang lord, a "beautiful" assistant D.A. and a robots in disguise. Wait a minute. Something doesn't fit here.
In Selected Theaters
Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters - I will hunt down this movie this weekend. Most likely Sunday, which has become my new movie night. But, who wouldn't want to see Meatwad, Frylock and Master Shake for more than 15 minutes at a time. This will be comedy gold. Look for this movie. It's low budget, poorly animated, and just wrong in every way. Which is why, it's so right. Plus, they have the best movie title out this weekend. I mean, who else spells out punctuation? See, nobody. Watch this, or you're just another nerd. And you know what happens to nerds. They get their pants pulled down and they are spanked with moon rocks. Don't let that happen to you.
Pathfinder - Vikings discovered America way before Christopher Columbus stumbled upon the Caribbean on his way to Asia. This would make "Pathfinder" a documentary then. Which I'm just guessing won't make as much money because Karl Urban is not Al Gore or Michael Moore. But, wouldn't this movie be that much better if you could see either one of those don viking armor and start going medieval on some asses? Yeah, why doesn't Hollywood get all their ideas from me.
Perfect Stranger - Halle Berry works in an ad agency as a mousy office worker who finds out her boss is evil. Wasn't this the plot for "Catwoman" as well? Berry just got her star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. I'm wondering if it's for "Most retarded movie roles after winning an Oscar" category.
Redline - Eddie Griffin crashed a fake Ferrari to promote this movie. So you know it has to be good. Cars and racing . . . and I'm guessing chicks? Is this the next installment in the Fast and the Furious franchise? "Fast and the Furious - European Extreme"? Who cares. If this makes money (2nd or 3rd in the top five) this weekend, I'm taking a sledgehammer to the next Lamborghini I see.
Slow Burn - Never heard of it. Could be possibly good, or possibly bad. With a name like that, and starring Ray Liotta, it could just be a movie about something . . . burning slowly. The synopsis I read said something about a gang lord, a "beautiful" assistant D.A. and a robots in disguise. Wait a minute. Something doesn't fit here.
In Selected Theaters
Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters - I will hunt down this movie this weekend. Most likely Sunday, which has become my new movie night. But, who wouldn't want to see Meatwad, Frylock and Master Shake for more than 15 minutes at a time. This will be comedy gold. Look for this movie. It's low budget, poorly animated, and just wrong in every way. Which is why, it's so right. Plus, they have the best movie title out this weekend. I mean, who else spells out punctuation? See, nobody. Watch this, or you're just another nerd. And you know what happens to nerds. They get their pants pulled down and they are spanked with moon rocks. Don't let that happen to you.
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