Box Office Report - My Money Sense is Tingling

Spider-Man 3 - So, this movie made a ton of money this past weekend, and also broke a record set by some pirate movie last year. The third outing in the Spider-Man franchise brought in an unprecedented $148 million to Sony Pictures . . . and the executives at that movie studio are rolling in money like pigs in shit. Did I watch it this past weekend? No. Don't tell me what happens. I'm waiting until it hits the 2 for 1 theater in Pasadena. 5 bucks ya'll. Or maybe I'll see it next weekend, where it will make another trillion dollars.

Disturbia - For 2 weeks in a row, this movie was number one. But it couldn't contend with the box office juggernaut that is the movie currently holding the top spot. But, is this movie good? Who knows. It's got that LaBouef kid. He's charismatic-ish? I'm not going to watch this. Why? Well, I don't watch the Disney Channel and I'm not a tween girl.

Fracture - This movie actually moved up one spot in the top five. Not many movies do that. But then again, it only $3 million this weekend. A bit anemic wouldn't you say? Which is why it gets an anemic entry.

The Invisible - The next few sentences will be written in invisible ink.



Next - So, Nick Cage? What new hairstyle will you be sporting for your next box office disaster? Mullet? Jerry-Curl? Whi-fro?

Box Office Report - Didn't See it Coming

Disturbia - Never underestimate the pull that Shia LeBoef has with the tween crowd. I mean, who cares about him other than all the "Even Stevens" fans who keep watching those re-runs on the Disney Channel. Sure, he's an OK actor. But enough to keep this movie at #1 for two weeks straight? I don't think so. America and I are not on speaking terms right now.

The Invisible - Guess no one was either interested in this or people are just saving up for next weekend, when the first major blockbuster of the year should be released. This rather forgettable mystery was, indeed, invisible to viewers who passed this up.

Next - Nick Cage. When will you learn that it's not the weird haircuts that you sport in your movies that draws in the crowds, but rather the caliber of the stories you're acting in. Take some time to re-evaluate your career man. When a big "action" movie opens up with just over 7 million, that's not even enough to pay for the advertising campaign. I guess he didn't see this coming. Haha, get it, because the movie is about a guy that can see into the future. *sigh* Why do I have to explain myself to you people.

Fracture - Yawn. Isn't it Anthony Hopkins' nap time? Someone get him his puree'd steak and potatoes and an extra thick straw. The man has to watch his "Matlock" for crying outloud.

Blades of Glory - It should be a crime for a movie that looks as ridiculous as this to make over 100 million dollars. But there's no denying the allure of Will Ferrell. That motherfucker's funny. But is he really 100 million dollars funny? I guess America has decided that already.

Special #6 Entry

Hot Fuzz - This movie is performing alright despite the fact that it has those silly English accents and it's been ignored by pretty much the whole of the mainstream American public. We watched this the weekend it opened and had a great time. You should really take your time to find this movie and watch it in the theaters. By the power of Greyskull . . . .

Opening Weekend Movies - 4/27/07

So . . . not a whole lot of posting going on this week, but I have a couple of extra minutes between porno free trailer sites and X Box 360 playing this morning before I have to go to work, so let's take a look at the opening weekend movies.

The Condemned - Let's go over what this movie has. Wrestler? Check. Futuristic-type setting? Check. People fighting to survive? Check. America's infatuation with reality television? Check. So, who's going to go watch this? All of those poor WWE wrestling fans. Vince McMann will be hearing a lot Ka-chings this weekend.

The Invisible - Sort of like a horror movie without any horror, or a mystery movie with no mystery because you already know what's going on. Interesting direction to go, huh? What were the producers thinking when they went into this? I think I'd rather watch "The Condemned" this weekend than this movie.

Kickin' It Old School - Jamie Kennedy is going to so X you if you go watch this movie. I can see it already. You're the only one in the theater and then he comes in, dressed in an usher uniform, with a fake nose on of course, and then you see the camera crews. Serves you right for paying 10 dollars to see this piece of crap that should have been straight to Betamax. Why Betamax? Because they're kicking it old school.

Next - What? The MTW show where people with loose morals go through dates in minutes, actually, they have a countdown. Oh, I knew it was too good to be true. No, this is Nick Cage, with another bad haircut, predicting the future to try to save something. Or someone. Does it even matter? You know this is science fiction when you have Jessica Biel as his romantic interest. Probably this week's big earner. *sigh*