The Mojave Experiment - Ground Breaking?

Oh Microsoft. Lately, everywhere I go on the internets, I'm running into banner ads for this "Mojave Experiment" that Microsoft is trying to push on us to drum up some good publicity for Windows Vista. I get it. Your much bally-hooed operating system is crap and you want to sell some more copies of it. I guess they got a bunch of people into a focus group session and made sure their only exposure to computers excluded everything except other Windows OS versions. There's a couple of videos in their video wall of people reacting to something Microsoft is calling "Instant Search". It's ground breaking apparently.

If it hadn't been around forever and a day ago in my beloved Mac OSX. And not even the latest one. I'm still rocking version 10.4. You can head on out to this website to check out Microsoft going on and on about this feature, and other features that are new to them, but have been around for quite some time for Mac users. Oh, and just for shits and giggles, I decided to do my own search for my computer's calculator application using "Spotlight". Check it out.

Haha! Suck it Microsoft! I found my calculator (not that I didn't already know where it was anyway) without using Windows Vista.

Vista "Innovation"

I was at the Best Buy yesterday, trying to explain to an aunt of mine the folly of buying a Windows-based PC. So, we were in the laptop aisle, and the store had a couple of Vista-ready machines on display. No prices, because Vista is not released until tomorrow. Actually, funny side note on this. If someone were to actually ring up a computer with Vista installed on it, the Best Buy registers would ring them up with a value of $10,000.00. Yeah, this would be to deter any before the launch sales of PC's with the operating system (OS) in them.

So, back to my observation of the so-called innovations that Vista is packing. Sure, you can put full motion videos of a babbling brook as your background (who cares?) and it all looks "prettier" now. Kinda pretty like a Mac . . . hmm . . . we'll get back to that in a paragraph. But it all taxes your system to the tune of 1 Gig of RAM. To handle the new OS. What are all the people that are still running 256 MB's of RAM or less that we talk to everyday. "Buy a new computer" I guess is what they'll be hearing a lot. Good for commerce. Fucked up for the consumer if you ask me.

And, here's what I'm a little worked up about today. Vista Gadgets. Take a look at these.

It's the ones on the far right of the screen shot. They sure do look helpful right. Nice to have the weather and the time (although, computers already have a clock on the bottom right-hand corner) and other things that tell you about whatever you might want to know. It's nice. It was even nicer almost two years ago when Apple's OS 10.4 came out. It had a little thing called "Widgets". Take a look.

Oh my God (OMG for the cool kids), it's like totally the same thing. Sure, Apple's is less obtrusive, since with a touch of a key on your keyboard then disappear and then come back with the same keystroke. With Vista's . . . they're there unless you turn them off . . . individually . . . what a chore. I'm sure there's a "easier" way to do this, but for the average computer user (or, as they like to call themselves - computer stupid) they're always going to have the "Gadget" just sitting there, taking up real estate on their computer monitors. So, even when Windows clearly borrows (or steals if you want my opinion) from Apple, they don't do it right.

Enjoy your new Vista-ready PC's you dumb fucktards. Remember, those innovations . . . we Apple users have already had for at least a couple of years.

iPhone Dials up my Interest

Well, the time has finally come. The iPhone from Apple is revealed . . . and it indeed does not have buttons. It also does not look like the previously leaked image that can be found in that perma-link there. So, the information was a little off. Who cares, look at that thing. It runs OSX, aka - what Windows Vista wants so badly to be. It's 11 mm thick. That's millimeters. Get metric already. That's 1.1 centimeters thin, or, if you want to use the British measurement scale, it translates to roughly "thinner than anything out there". So, how do you use it? Well, it will have a stylus-free, multi-finger touchscreen interface. It contains motion-sensors to detect orientation. So if you hold it sideways, the display will flip to accommodate you. Automatically senses when you put it to your ear and turns off sound and picture. It connects with your iPod, and syncs with iTunes to show video and pictures and play MP3s. Allows real-time scrolling of music either stored on the phone or through connected iPod. And, it senses ambient light levels and adjusts display to optimum quality. It also gives Jaimes multiple orgasms when you put it up to their ear(s). So, there it is. Who's getting one?

UPDATE!
OMG OMG OMG. This picture is much better than my original picture, and can be found as part of Gizmodo's MacWorld coverage. Thanks to Ryan for bringing that to my attention. This cellphone's like the 2nd coming of Jesus.