Friday Night Films - 9/22/06

I know, it's been a couple of weeks since I've taken a look at the opening movies, but it's not like I've been going to the movies a lot lately. Last time I went was for a "Beerfest/Crank". Did the whole "pay for one, slip into the 2nd for free". Might do that this weekend as well. After all, tonight, my vacation starts up. That means a whole week with no blog posts (if I can help it).

Wide Releases

All the King's Men - A lot of big stars in this movie . . . and Sean Penn. Ha! Take that sucka. You're going down like your brother. Oh wait. Maybe that was a little on the harsh side. Anyway, this is a remake of an old Oscar winner. It's about a southern politician that gets corrupted by the "system". I'm not watching this movie. Southern politics just don't amuse me. Now, if we're talking about Northern California's attempt at legalizing marijuana . . . that's a film I'm willing to watch. But this? It's a pass for me.

Flyboys - Ah . . . the ladies love the James Franco. He's so dreamy. *sigh*. Thankfully, he's not assualting us with multiple movies this time like back in the "Annapolis/Tristan&Isolde" movie blitz from a few months ago. I can handle a James Franco movie from time to time. Heck, I own both Spider-Man movies. And I love historical war movies. Most of the time, people concentrate on WWII (one less W and it turns into a Nintendo console), so seeing a WWI movie might interest me. Plus, who doesn't like exploding zeppelins. God I wish I were around when the Hindenburg exploded. That would have been boss. This is a maybe for me. Depends on what the wife says about it.

Jackass: Number Two - You know, I was waiting for "Son of Jackass" to come out. Instead, they made a Number Two. Which is great. I hear the stunts are more dangerous and hilarious this time around. Which is awesome. This movie I actually want to pay to see this weekend. And I think it will make top dollar at the box office. Why? Because America loves its Jackasses. This is a definite watch for me this weekend. Now, I just need to figure out what the "slip into for free" movie we're going to follow this up with.

Jet Li's Fearless - The whole apostrophe-s is confusing me. Are they implying that Jet Lis IS fearless, or that Fearless belongs to Jet Li? I don't know. Should I care. Possibly. This is, allegedly, Jet Li's last martial arts movie. I guess he's going the Van Damme route and will only take dramatic roles. I wonder if there are a lot of openings for short, 45 year old chinese men with a shaky command of the English language in Hollywood. The wife and I enjoy a good martial arts movie, and we might watch this . . . but most likely not. This is another maybe.

Selected Theaters Releases (Descriptions provided by Yahoo! Movies, with snippets of my own commentary . . . because I can).

American Hardcore - A documentary about the early-80's hardcore punk scene, featuring Black Flag, Bad Brains and Minor Threat. *yawn*

Bandidas - Salma Hayek and Penelope Cruz are two wild west bank robbers fighting a ruthless robber baron who takes over their town. *Salma and Penelope in corsetts = Muy caliente!*

Feast - A diverse group of people trapped in an isolated tavern must fight for survival against flesh-hungry creatures that lay siege. *Are there really any other type of creature than the flesh hungry variety?*

Renaissance - An animated sci-fi thriller about a cop looking for a missing woman and the secret of eternal youth in Paris of 2053. *I bet it does not involve showering regularly.*

The Science of Sleep - A creative guy (Gael Garcia Bernal) whose dreams overtake his reality tries to romance his neighbor. Directed by Michel Gondry. *We heart Michel Gondry, totally watching this.*