TuGMO - Pajama Party

Girls in matching pajamas. Check. Making out. Check. A little tounge action. Check. Personal lubricant & towels. I'll leave that up to you. What more can I provide for you. These two chicks are doing most of the job anyway. Contribute something to the damn party for crying out loud. But not crabs. Leave those at the free clinic.

Upskirt City - Bianca Gascoigne

So, who is this chick and why do we care about her here at BAFW enough to post up an entry dedicated to her. I'm sure that you, as I earlier today, had never heard of Bianca Gascoigne. Unless you get a satellite feed from the UK and love their reality television programming. See, Bianca is part of some show called "Love Island", which I guess has something to do with love and an island. The concept is truly avant-garde. But still, why do we care right? Not like British chicks are all that and a bag of fish & chips. The little picture below this paragraph will shed some light on why, and some light on a place where the sun don't shine much either.


Ah yes, the upskirt. Even though we have no idea just what the status of this international C-list celebrity is currently, we can't resist a good upskirt picture. And by good upskirt, we mean one with the whole vag' showing. That's why I passed on the posting of the Avril Lavigne upskirts from last week. Sure, it was a valid upskirt, and she's not horrible looking (anymore), but she was wearing underoos or something. While that may look cute (and bordeline pedophiliac), if you don't show the pink taco, you're not getting posted. That's a brand new decree here at BAWF. No bearded clams . . . no Upskirt City post. Period.

Penguin Epic

"March of the Penguins" was great and all . . . but if you thought it was missing something, and by something I mean some raunchy humor courtesy of comedians and some wacky voice-over work, then "Farce of the Penguins" is the movie you've been waiting for. Below is a link to the trailer for it, which looks to be pretty funny (if you are into this sort of stuff). I'll watch it. I think I'm one of the few people that actually enjoyed "The Aristocrats" and "Jesus is Magic", so this feels like something I can get behind (if you know what I mean . . . but not in a bestiality sort of way).

Trailer Link

You will need Quicktime to watch this. I finally can watch Quicktime trailers (most of the time) at work ever since one of the cooler IT guys hooked me up with access.

Television Imitates Life

The picture below is high-larious. I mean, look at the news anchor. Then, look at the picture of the rapist that they're reporting on. Did this guy at any point in time during the newscast do a double-take and say to himself "Wait, what the fuck? When did I start raping?" This just kind of cements the way that the police views the black man. They all look alike.

Holy shit! He's already in your house!

Search Junkie - I Needs mah Search Terms

I tried to quit cold turkey man. But the search terms . . . they call out to me. And Sitemeter is so great about telling me just what you people are always looking for. So, like a weak punk, I crawl back to it's abusive and exploitative search smack. I love you search terms. *sobs*

slither nip slip - Google Search
katherine mcphee wardrobe - Google Search
portman vendetta schoolgirl - Google Search
salma +"snake dance" +clip - Google Search UK
linsey lohan camel toe - MSN Search
basic instinct legs clip - Google Search UK
gymnast peeing - Google Search
scarlett johansson - BlogSearch
photo of kristen dunst buyt - Google Search
australia snake upskirt children funny - Google Search SE
rachel bilson nipple shot - Google Search
french gymnast peeing - Google Search
boobless emma watson - Google Search
schnoze - Google Search
anne hathaway brokeback nude wmv - Google Search
emma watson nip slip - Google Search
scarlett - BlogSearch
kate bosworth, before and after - Google Search ES
"brazilian wax" - BlogSearch
linsey lohan butt - Google Search
wardrobe malfunction photos - BlogSearch
upskirt - BlogSearch
blogs are for wusses - MSN Search UK
katherine mcphee's nipples - Google Search
rachel mcadams screencaps - Google Search FR
jennifer connely nude - Blogdigger
emma watson malfunction - Google Search AR
shaved blogurl - BlogSearch
sheer bra perversion - Google Search UK
tv upskirt no panties - BlogSearch
Eva Mendes - Naver Search
Jenny McCarthy pooped her pants - Google Search
jessica alba ass - AltaVista Search
emma watson panties - Google Search
hostel screencaps clips - Google Search
katherine mcphee sexy photo - Google Search
Olympic Nipple Slip - MSN Search
Maggie Grace nipple - Google Search NL
(Pants off) Pete Wentz-Fall Out Boy - Google Search
blingo - Technorati Search
hillbilly no underwear upskirt - Google Search AU
anne hathaway armpit hair - Google Search AU
nude men blogurl: - BlogSearch
foxnews youtube upskirt - Google Search
emma watson boob slip - Google Search
rachel mcadams oops and upskirt - Google Search
mariah carey thunder thighs - Google Search UK
Morgan Webb fhm - Google Search
panty viewing - Google Search ZA
marianna's trench - say anything music videos - Google Search CA
+ts25+cheating - Google Search CH
nsfw-clips - Google Search SE
tv presenter upskirt - MSN Search UK
emma watson caught drinking - Google Search
fully clothed pissing - BlogSearch
jaime little - Yahoo Search
"emilie de ravin" "rape scene" - Google Search
Anne Hathaway masturbate - Google Search SE
Evangeline Lilly nip - Google Search
actress see through papparazi - Google Search
new mix shit - Yahoo Seach
tara reid nip sip - Google Search
wedgie spanking - Google Search
lohan crotch shot kids choice - Google Search
footjob vma - Google Search SE
Lindsay lohan upskirt kids choice - Google Search
emma watson's thong - Google Search UK
linsey lohan accidental flash - Yahoo Search
lindsay lohan upskirt at nick kids awards - Google Search
reese whitherspoon - Google Search
linsey lohan's bare behind nude pics - Yahoo Search
anne hathaway havoc mpg - Google Search
scarlett johanssen nipple - MSN Search
lindsay lohan nipples moscow - Google Search
Emma Watson's stomach - Google Search
Sharon Stone's accident crotch shot - Google Search

Moby - New York New York

OK, I'm officially loving Moby again. Platonically mind you. This video has some crazy dance moves, wild costume changes, and Moby break-dancing. Or someone that looks like Moby. They do wonders with computer generated effects these days. I enjoyed the video, you should as well. If you don't . . . then you're Eminem. In that case . . . what are you doing here Slim Shady? Shouldn't you be watching your "Crank Yankers" DVD's?

Corporate is teh Nuts

We're at the mercy of our higher-ups, as some of you are as well out there. It's inevitable. Unless you work for yourself, you're always going to have someone trying to tell you how to do everything . . . from dealing with customers to which religion's business management model you should adhere to. If the company I work for could regulate our breathing, I'm pretty sure they would have already done so.

So, what is precipitating this post? A little e-mail we got. I'm not going to repost it. That would not be appropriate, but I will paraphrase. The basic message is that we should support trial users on the phone. While this is a dashing and fantastic idea in theory, it really does not work in practice? Why? Because the people that use trial versions have not actually purchased the product. They have it for free.

We're not all heart-less in tech support. We do answer questions from trial users via e-mail. The thing is, in the e-mail that came trickling down all the way to us via our department heads, it says, explicitly, that we have to support the customers on the phone. We can't tell them that we will send them an e-mail to deal with the problem. ON THE PHONE. The little problem is, that, not even our regular paid clients with 1 purchased license of the product get free phone support.

After we've gotten them running properly with their trial versions, we're supposed to tell them that after they purchase the product, that they will have access to the 24/7 e-mail support service and the $19.95/incident telephone tech support. So, essentially, if they buy the product, their level of support actually decreases. I'm scratching my head as I think about the way that I'm going to break that little nugget of delicious disappointment to the customer.

As I stated in the title of this post . . . corporate is teh nuts.

HDH - Scarlett Johansson

I'm pretty sure that Scarlett Johansson has been featured in the "Hump Day Hottie" posts in the past . . . but Jeebus-be-damned, she's never been photographed just wearing an unbuttoned sweater, short-shorts and knee-high socks. Wow. My eyes have boners right now. This comes from Allure magazine, which is truly living up to it's name and provides us with this alluring image. I don't remember exactly when Scarlett went from okay looking with a slightly deep voice, to hotter than the sun with . . . but I don't care. And those all-natural breasts. You can't beat that. The slight tug of gravity. Fake boobs just don't compare with the real thing. Thank you, from the bottom of BAFW's croth, Scarlett Johansson.

*Note - I prepped this post on Monday. You don't know how much I've been waiting for Wednesday to come around to make this post schedule appropriate. This is the first Wednesday in a while that I have looked forward to.

Bush Sails the Interweb on the Computerbox

Our president is great. The video above details his prominent knowledge on the internet . . . which starts with him using "the Google" and ends with him looking at his ranch on "Google Earth" or "Google Maps". I'm not sure what he uses because he doesn't even know what he's using. He knows what he doesn't use though . . . e-mail. Our president never e-mails and doesn't receive e-mails. Because he's afraid of what he's going to get. Has this guy ever heard of spam-blockers? Just think about that America. This is who you elected to lead the world's most powerful nation. Someone who doesn't know how to use an e-mail page. Let's just hope he doesn't know how to use the button that launches the "nu-cu-lar" weapons we have.

BAWF Music Recommends

I like music. You should like the music I like. It's only natural really. Use the below to find an LCD Soundsystem (Daft Punk is playing at their house) track that lasts for 45 minutes. It was commissioned by Nike, and it's for jogging . . . I think. Who knows. I do know that is is free. So, what are you waiting for.

Click Me

I just hope where you're at there isn't a ridiculously set up firewall system that slows down the 1st quarter's worth of the download to a sub-dial-up'ish crawl (2.1 KB/sec!) before it speeds up to a more acceptable speed. The file is a good 43+ MB's in size.

TuGMO - Who Needs Witty?

Who needs witty remarks when you have hot girls making out . . . in a video format! Thank you YouTube. Now I know why Google spent over 1.6 billion dollars to buy you. While these videos are priceless, I would also settle for that amount to sell out to the internet giant. I can only imagine what I could do with 1.6 billion bucks. I mean, that's 1.6 billion Wendy's frostees right there.

Nipple-Topia - Rachel Bilson

I never watched "The OC", so I never really had the hots for this girl. Although, I do remember her from some Subway commercials . . . trying to pimp out some footlong subs. The dirty slut. Anyway, here she is, Rachel Bilson, wearing a see-trough top. With no bra underneath. God I love how completely clueless celebrities can be. It's like they're asking for it. Never in their distorted sense of reasoning does it cross their mind that maybe a flash from a camera can render their clothing translucent. So, enjoy the nipple-age. And check out this ironic shot below. You see, she's standing in front of a poster for "Garden State", a movie that the last movie she was in, "The Last Kiss" totally ripped off of. At least she's showing us her cans . . . unlike Natalie Portman. Stingy bitch. *hmph!*

Las Vegas Confidential

1:26 AM, 10/21/06

So . . . no post about the latest movies opening today (or actually, yesterday, since today is tomorrow. Wrap your head around that doozy) because I'm in Las Vegas right now. And yes, like most other schmucks out there, I'm already down 100 bucks. But I've got a mighty buzz going.

Nickel slots didn't pan out for me, but my wife only lost 20 some bucks, and we got some 3 dollar beers at a little bar at the Rio. Right now, we're about ready to do what people in Sin City do. I'll keep this post updated throughout the weekend. Lates bitches.

12:05 PM, 10/21/06

Just got out of the Rio buffet. The Platinum one, not the one that the regular riff raff go to. 'Cause that's how I roll, you naw'm'sayin'. And, for the most part, it was pretty much run of the mill buffet food. Sure, there was a lot of it, but I feel I could have eaten the same amount and had the same quality at . . . I don't know, a Denny's? And for half the price?

I did get a snazzy shirt celebrating the event that we are attending. It's got a picture of my cousin and his soon to be wife, with the slogan right over it that reads "From Nitros to Nuptials". It's a little on the gh3y side, but at least mine was white. They had to wear baby blue versions of what the rest of the people attending this thing got.

Most of them are going to get some special treatment at the spa here at the casino. Not sure if "happy endings" are a part of it, but Heather and I are headed out to the Monte Carlo to check out some shark tank. And then to the MGM Grand to check out lions. Heather loves those animals, so it's more for her. But I do delight in seeing her have fun.

So, off we go. We have a couple of hours to kill before we meet up with the rest of the group. After that, it's more gambling, and then we're going to a club called "The Voodoo Lounge" on top of the casino. It's on the 54th floor . . . and it's going to get nipply up there.

3:21 PM, 10/21/06

We're back from our excursion to the Mandalay Bay and the MGM Grand. We first hit up the Mandalay Bay casino, because we really wanted to check out the Shark Reef attraction they had. One of the people we are hanging out with this weekend told us that it would be free, so we were pretty friggin' excited about it. We get there, and find out that it's actually $15.95/person. Being that we're not cash money millionaires (yet), we decided not to check it out but rather test our luck at gambling again.

Well, the Mandalay Bay sucks. I was up 3 bucks, but then I ended up losing 5 cents. Heather on the other hand, is down $20 bucks. So we kind of leave the place, tails between our legs, and scampered off towards the MGM Grand in search of lions. We parked at the Tropicana, were I noticed that they had $5 blackjack tables. So I thought, why not.

I was again, down about 35 bucks when my luck turned and I started getting double downs going my way and a couple of 21's. Then Heather rolled around, and instantly I get a 12. Not good. She's my blackjack kryptonite. Which is fine, because I seem to her slot-cooler (and yes, that does sound kind of dirty). She left though, sensing her bad luck coming over me, and I got a 21 right after. I decided not to temp my luck too much there, and left the table 20 dollars richer (or 80 bucks down if you count last night's losses).

We finally made it to the MGM and did get to spend some up close (with a glass wall between us) time with some lions. We even got to check out some lion cubs. They were, adorable. But, the casino wanted 200 bucks for lion cub interaction. You'd think that you'd get like 30 minutes to an hour with the cubs. You'd be wrong. That's 200 bucks for 5 minutes.

We drove back to the Rio, ate a little bit in the room (not that kind of eating . . but maybe later), and now are headed to the pool area to hang out with our friends and family.

9:24 AM, 10/23/06

I know what you must have been wondering. Jaime hit the Megabucks and is a millionaire. That's why he didn't continue the blog post. Well . . . not so much. Vegas cleaned me out. I'm going to be eating Maruchan cup of noodles for the rest of the week. The reason I didn't continue posting was just 'cause my brother had paid for 1 day's worth of internet access ($12.95!!) and he didn't want to spend another 13 bucks on that for Sunday.

No biggie really. We went to the Voodoo Lounge Saturday night for what was supposed to be a great dinner and clubbing experience. The dinner itself was 3 hours. The service was terrible. The appetizers were blah, the salads were competent, the rib eye steak was great, but by the time the desserts (delicious btw) came around, we were all too full to even look at them.

So, after that, we went up to the 51st floor for the the whole dancing portion of the night. I don't dance, but I did shake my thang up there for 20 minutes or so. Then, we needed to find a place to sit, because Heather was wearing some killer high heeled shoes. By killer, I mean they were extremely uncomfortable. Unfortunately, all the lounge areas were cordoned off. She darted under one of the cordons and sat down. I looked at the people who "owned" the area for the night and I asked if it was ok for her to sit down for a little bit. The guy gave me an "I don't know, but I think you better get her the hell out of our VIP area quick" look.

This was a bit dick-ish of them, but I can understand (but only marginally) why they would take that stance. But Heather does not see things the way I see when she's had a drink or two. She's all about loving the world and getting along with everyone, and she did try to get along with these a-holes. She tried to be amicable with them, and they even said "Oh, sure, just don't try to drink our booze" but, 5 minutes later, we had a burly security guy escort us out of their super special cordoned off area.

I would have been ok with this, but Heather is part Irish, so once her mellow is killed by this, she's up for a fist fight. She's screaming at them to fuck off, and almost starting shit with the security guard, so I have to re-direct her towards the indoors area, and we finally find a place for her to sit. By now, we're not feeling great about this club, and we're tired, so we head back to our room for the night. She's still pretty pissed about the whole deal, and I'm trying to calm her down.

We wake up Sunday morning, exhausted, and start packing so we can get the hell out of Vegas. The town has not treated us very nicely, and even though we didn't have to pay for the room at the Rio, we are down $300+ bucks. We limp down the highway to Primm, were we test our luck at some quarter machines. Twenty bucks later, we're on the road again.

Mostly uneventful driving. Saw some roadkill. Traveled at speeds ranging from 5 mph to 100 mph. The 5 mph portion of our trip happened around Victorville, where a yellow Nissan 350z somehow managed to get demolished. I really hope that they had a good car insurance carrier. We got home, finally, 4 1/2 hours after leaving Vegas, and crashed on our couch, catching up on missed television.

Girl Fight Friday - Phillipine-Punch-Out

I don't know what these chicks are fighting about. First of all, they barely speak English. 2nd of all . . . do I even care? I just want to see a fight. The dirtier the better. One of those Asian chicks should have started donkey-punching another one . . . or maybe given one a dirty Sanchez. Oh wait, I'm thinking about another kind of dirty. Ignore that little bit of perversion, and enjoy this little knock-down dust up.

Tyra Banks = WTF

You will watch this video. It's inevitable. And after you watch this video, you will sit in front of your computer, trying to make sense out of life. Because it is that life-changing. It's like a paradoxical-dichotomy wrapped in a paradigm shift that is sprinkled with a dash of self-realization.

Yes, I know, that's some deep shit. And what is this all about? Vase-fuckin-line. Tyra . . . You've blown my mind once again with your "fierceness".

The Amazing Disappearing Bosworth

This is how I will always remember Kate Bosworth. Taut body, pretty smile, sparkling eyes. *sigh* If you've seen pictures of her recently, you know that she's currently in a competition to lose as much weight as possible. Who is she competing with? Possibly Nicole Ritchie. Who knows. She just looks terrible now. And if you haven't seen her recently and you are entertaining the thought that "maybe she's not looking that terrible", let me shine a little light on the situation.

This is Kate Bosworth now. She looks like she's auditioning for the sequel to "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" that is currently casting only in her damaged (and most likely starving) psyche. Someone hand this girl a piece of toast and some orange juice. Maybe this is a direct result of dating Orlando Bloom. He probably called her a fatty all the time and it just fucked her up so much that she just won't eat . . . or vomits a lot.

Oh well, no matter how skinny she gets, the first image will always hold a special place in my groin. Where did you think it would be? My heart? LOL. You sappy bitch.

Sexy to Un-Sexy . . . en Francais

I've been posting a steady stream of hot material here on BAFW for the past few days. I think it's time I change it up a bit. I don't want to get stuck in a rut. A sexy rut. So, here's a little music video I found today on YouTube that kind of baffled me a little bit. See, I was not aware that "Prison Break" was so big in France. So big in fact that the show is dubbed (who could read French subtitles anyway) and even has a hit song tied to it. A French rap song. And here it is, in all it's glory, or lack-there-of.

The "artist" goes by the gangsta-moniker of Faf Larage, and the "song" is called "Pas Le Temps". You can tell from the opening synthesizer riff that this song is going to corner you in the showers and make you drop your soap. Because it is gay like that. Prison gay. Be prepared to write up an apology to your ears.

Nipple-Topia - Mischa Barton Revisited

I have to say . . . BAWF has gotten a little bit on the sexy side this week. What with the "bra & panty" chicks making out, the Canadian moose-knuckle pictures, and now this. Now, sure, Mischa Barton looks a tad on the ridiculous side for going around wearing tartan gift-wrap as a skirt (complete with bow), but that incredibly sheer tank-top makes up for it. Word of advice for Mischa . . . if you're going to be shopping in the frozen foods section, make sure the fabric in charge of covering your (boney) chest pillows is a little less on the translucent side. Otherwise, you're just giving us internet bloggers more fodder to fuel the ridiculing machine.

That, and if you keep this up, you'll never get that Mother Teresa role in the movie that you've always wanted to make. You're already boney like her. Now, you just have to cut down on the slutty, and you'd be perfect.

HDH - Grace Park

Grace Park spends a lot of time looking dirty, tired, and beat-up while on my new favorite sci-fi show "Battlestar Galactica". But, even though she's got the grimy make-up, she still looks pretty damn good. Specially if you throw her into a Maxim spread (picture below), then you've got yourself a hottie that is hump-worthy in the eyes of BAWF. And sure, I'm way past my whole "yellow-fever" phase of attraction, but that doesn't mean I can't appreciate the good looks that Grace Park has. And she's part of the cast of a great television show that everyone (not just nerds) should be watching. I don't know what else she's worked on, but it doesn't matter, does it? She's got this great entry in her acting resume, and should pretty much blank out anything before this and just say "Hey, I was that hot Cylon chick on that Battlestar show". That should get her an acting gig anywhere.
Or she could just slip them this picture. You know, whatever works.

Canadian Moose Knuckle

Not a whole lot of great stuff comes from our neighbor to the north. Sure, maple syrup and hockey are aight. I guess it was finally time that they redeemed themselves . . . by giving us their version of the Camel-Toe . . . the mighty Moose Knuckle. So, thank you Canada. You've just bought yourself some time until the United States decides to "annex" you and make you our 51st state. Don't worry, Puerto Rico won't take that spot. That's our "back-burner-bitch" colony.