Zack and Miri Make a Porno Audition

"Zack and Miri Make a Porno" is the latest film from writer/director Kevin Smith. My favorite fat man in a trench-coat and shorts got Elizabeth Banks (Scrubs) and Seth Rogen (Knocked Up, Pineapple Express) for this movie, pretty much ensuring the hilarity factor. Rock solid Smith. This is making me forget about that piece of crap "Jersey Girl" movie abortion you made. Retribution fool!*

*The opera music channel my wife has going on in the background is making my writing a little more dramatic than usual. I feel like a need a rapier and some burly fellows to fight with right now. Adieu mon petit blog++.

++Holy fuck that was bug-nuts crazy. WTF mang?

Bikini-Star Galactica

"Battlestar Galactica" is one of my favorite shows. Period. Everything about the show, from the writing to the acting to dramatic scenes to the full blown space sci-fi action is pitch-perfect. And they have some hot ass robot babes to boot. So, here they are. Two Cylons and a human (at least for now) cast members have stripped their flight suits and slipped into bikinis for a photoshoot. I don't know what the publication is, and to tell you the truth, I don't care much. It's just a shame that "Battlestar Galactica" is ending with its fourth season. I'm going to miss the show. Enjoy the pictures and check out the show, airing tonight on the Sci-Fi Channel. Check your local listings for times. What the fuck do I look like, your own personal TV Guide.







Many thanks to Grace Park, Katee Sackhoff and Tricia Helfer for putting in great performances on the show. Kudos on the camel-toes as well. The science fiction fanbase should go nuts for these pictures.

Pamela Anderson Upskirts - What Else Were you Expecting?

It's tough to "wow" a crowd when you're Pamela Anderson. I mean, if you see her anywhere, you're almost guaranteed to see something inappropriate, no matter where the location is. You might be in the waiting room for the dentist, and she strolls in, fully clothed, and by the time you get out of there, you've somehow contracted Hep-C or some weird Anderson-ailment. Hmm . . . maybe that wasn't the best analogy ever, but you get my point. Wherever Anderson goes, her cooch is sure to appear to you and most likely will get all up in your grill. Thankfully (in my opinion at least), this time it was clothed. But that dress she's wearing is fucking built for upskirts. Why else would it be cinched up front like that? Ladies? Any insight into this? Do I even have female readers? Maybe if I posted more wang-age. I've gone on a tangent again, right? Here are the rest of the pictures. It's hard to keep focused when you're being assaulted by almost-elderly vaginas sometimes. I hope you appreciate the effort and sacrifice I put into this.

Amy Winehouse - Attacks in Depends?

I think the general consensus is that Amy Winehouse's brain has melted from repeated exposure to illegal substances. Crack is whack ya'll's. Now, I know that drugs can make some belligerent, which explains photo #2 in this post. That's where Winehouse is going after some paparazzi. But, photo #3 is an upskirt (not sexy) that looks like it features some adult diaper action going on (very very not sexy). Now, it might be that the incontinence that Winehouse is allegedly suffering from is from her alcohol abuse, that kind of makes sense. But she's young, she should be able to hold it. Right? Anyway, here are the rest of the pictures. Sorry if this ruined your interwebs-browsing. The truth is not pretty sometimes.

Mario Lopez Launches Nip-Slip'd Lady Friend

Mario Lopez knows how to treat a lady right. I'm taking notes right now on how to better handle a nip slip from "A.C. Slater" himself. The chick that Mario Lopez has sitting on top of him is his dancing partner/girlfriend from "Dancing with the Stars" (don't ask me which season, I've never watched that show). Her name is Karina Smirnoff, and apart from having a cool name, that's pretty much all I know about her. That, and she wears bikinis, is boning "A.C. Slater", and is prone to the nip slip. Good catch Lopez. The pictures below depict his woman-tossing prowess, but not before he gets a good amount of nipple right in his eye. Extreme-close-up-style, for all the "Wayne's World" fans out there.

Search Terms - The May Motherload

This month's search terms haul was not accidentally deleted by someone. Which is good, because it makes it a little bit longer than April's results. What we've got here is the usual string of depravity with a couple of actually interesting searches peppered in there. Like "Vince Vaugh intestines". I have the movie "The Cell", so I know what they look like. There are also other searches in there indicating that people out there actually read this blog, and put the effort to look for it using search engines. Searches like "bloggedjamie.blogspot.com" and "BAFW" make me wonder . . . do I have a fan base? Probably not, but that would be cool.

paul de leeuw - BlogSearch NL
tv upskirt - BlogSearch ZA
"brooke hogan nip" - Google Search
"mariah carrey" - Google Search FR
upskirt - BlogSearch FR
club dread unrated - Naver Search
katharine mcphee ass rack "katharine mcphee's butt" - Google Search
attack of the show where to find marijuana in jamaica olivia munn - Google Search
alex McCord - BlogLines Search
nip slip - Ask.Com Search
malaysian sexblog - Yahoo Search
Nicole Scherzinger Nip Slip - Yahoo Search
crotch shot - MSN Search DK
girls not yet legal - AOL Search
vince vaughn intestines - Yahoo Search
Deception 2008 + rmvb hugh jackman - Google Search AU
emma watson+pussy slip site:blogspot.com - Google Search
brooke hogan - Google Search TR
Linsey Lohans MUFF - Yahoo Search
"emma watson nipple" - Yahoo Search
intercourse - MSN Search
confused puppy look - AOL Search
Emma Watson nude - BlogSearch
Hayden Panettiere - BlogSearch
kim kardashian nudepictures - Yahoo Search
ashely tisdale nude - MSN Search
olivia munn nude - AIM AOL Search
nude +tween - MSN Search
kim ryder topless - Yahoo Search UK
pics of lindsay lohans fire crouch - Yahoo Search
lily allen beavershot - Yahoo Search FR
lilly allen without nickers - Google Search NL
pussycat dolls upskirt - Yahoo Search
animated upskirts - AOL Search
fake nude olsen - MSN Search
amateur public sideboobs - Google Search DE
candid waterpark+brazil - AltaVista Search
ashley tisdale naked - MSN Search
Lily Allen pantyless upskirt in cannes - Yahoo Search DE
Kim Kardashian sex - MSN Search
BRAZILIAN SEX - MSN Search
rape mpegs site:*.blogspot.* - Google Search PT
"highway" "flashed her ass" - Google Search
how to pose for nude pictures - MSN Search
"emma watson's feet" - Google Search PH
upshorts - AOL Search
Lily Allen upskirt - Google Search AT
"hayden panettiere rape" - Google Search TR
Megan Fox WWTD.com - Google Search
Brooke Hogan Nip Slip - Ask.Com Search
"her landing strip" - MetaCrawler Search
utube upskirt - Ask.Com Search
"PINEAPPLE EXPRESS" - BlogSearch
Olsen Twin Upskirt Pussy Photos - MSN Search
carrot top biceps - Yahoo Search
kelly brook topless - Yahoo Search UK
lilly allen no knickers - Google Search UK
ladies peeing toilet, video clips - Google Search FI
cleavage - MSN Search
runway models nipple slip - Yahoo Search FR
amy smart - Google Search
Hayden Panettiere bikini - Google Search UK
pussy%20SLIP - MSN Search
blogs hitachi magic - Google Search BE
bloggedjamie.blogspot.com - Google Search CA
lindsay lohan - BlogSearch
samantha ronson - BlogSearch
kim kardashian - BlogSearch PH
lohan ronson - BlogSearch
miley Cyrus - BlogSearch
BAFW - Google Search CA
Emma Watson panties - Naver Search
emma watson nipslip - Yahoo Search JP
ASHLEY OLSEN nude - AOL Search
death wish 2, rape scene - AOL Search
kate bosworth nude - AOL Search
victoria%20beckham%20naked - MSN Search
nipslip return of the jedi - AlltheWeb Search
"anne hathaway" havoc masturbate - Yahoo Search
kardashian ass - BlogSearch
Hermione "peed her pants" - Google Search
beaver shots - Google Search CA
hayden ass - MSN Search
Brooke Hogan Nip Slip - Ask.Com Search
Kim kardashian + trunk - BlogSearch
topless girl fight - Google Search UK
boobs - BlogDigger Search
triple kiss - Google Search

Russian "Wanted" Trailer

"Wanted" is coming out later this year. I'm pretty sure it's this summer to be more specific, but I can't quite narrow it down to the exact date. I mean, I could, but I'm fucking lazy. So sue me. I'm sure I've already posted the domestic trailer for "Wanted", which was pretty good on it's own. That is, until I saw the Russian version of the trailer . . . and by fuck . . . if it isn't scene after scene of ass-kickery. It almost makes me want to move to Russia. If these are the kind of trailers they have over there, then sign me up. That, and I hear the vodka is so good it tastes like water. Check out the trailer here. The entire site is in Russian, along with the audio on the trailer. But I'm sure you'll be able to make out the international language of kick-ass while you see it.

Nick Bollea Cry Baby Call

Nick Bollea, son of Hulk Hogan, is in jail. He was busted for street racing and putting a friend in a coma after he wrapped his souped-up car around a tree. And, apparently, he's not taking it very well. This phone call was apparently recorded over Mother's Day weekend, and at that time, Nick had been in prison for less than 24 hours. I've never been in prison myself, but if I were to ever go, I'd want an isolated room. I don't care if they put me in solitary confinement. Anything to keep my butthole rape free. Click on the link below to hear him complaining about not leaving the room, and only having 10 feet to walk around and how he just wants to breath fresh air. Awww . . . man the fuck up. I say throw him in with the general jail population and let them have it at him. I'm sure he'd call his mom up real quick-like and ask that their lawyer get him back into solitary for the duration of his 8 month sentence.

Click here for whining.

Miley Cyrus is Inappropriate

Who the hell is raising this kid anyway? Isn't this like the second set of candid and rather inappropriate pictures (taken by Miley Cyrus herself) that have come out on the internets? All I want to know is, when her dad is not busy taking strangely creepy glamor shots with his daughter, why is he not making sure his underage daughter is not taking pictures in her underpants and pulling up her shirt. Unless this is some sort of Disney Channel version of "To Catch a Predator". Even though these pictures don't technically reveal anything, it's still wrong. This makes me afraid to have kid(s).

Lindsay Lohan - Lesbian'y Update

Yesterday, I posted an entry that hinted at Lindsay Lohan's alleged lesbian tendencies. Well, as you can see in the picture above, I'm still not claiming that Lindsay has gone full blown gay on us, but she is certainly making out with Samantha Ronson. Or, maybe she's wiping something off her lips with her own lips. Perhaps she's feeding Ronson like a mama-bird would a baby-bird. I don't know.

Kim Kardashian Ass Cleavage

By now you should know that Kim Kardashian is famous largely due to her ginormous Armenian ass. I'm pretty sure that thing has it's own zip code and telephone area code. E! is running a special appropriately called "Junk in the Trunk" to cash in on the popularity of Kardashian's caboose. I guess they're pulling a bunch of stuff that up until now was "unseen" from her reality show "Keeping up with the Kardashians", which includes these images of Kim showing her ass cleavage to the cameras. Which, is to be expected. She obviously is playing to her strengths.

Elisha Cuthbert Sideboob Could've Been More

Looking at the picture, it's a pretty decent sideboob. But, Elisha Cuthbert's recent pictorial in Maxim could have been so much more. If only she didn't have arms or legs to hide those boobs . . . Wait, that would be kind of weird actually. I'm not into naked multiple amputees, OK. Not that there's anything wrong with being into that. Umm . . . I'm just going to walk away from the computer now.

Lindsay Lohan Gets Cozy with BFF, OMG

I'm not going to say that Lindsay Lohan has gone lesbian. I'm also not going to say that she's making out with her DJ friend, Samantha Ronson. Furthermore, I will also not be saying that these two bump uglies in the night away from the prying eyes of the paparazzi. But . . . it certainly looks like that's what these two are up to. Take a look at the pictures below and make your own judgments. Me? I don't think she's a lesbian. I think she's just confused. I think that when she sees Samantha Ronson, she thinks she seeing that DJ Qualls guy and Lindsay might have an un-natural love for uber-geeky dudes.

Sharon Stone Upskirts on a Boat

The art of upskirting is usually seen whilst exiting automobiles. Leave it to super-classy lady Sharon Stone to show us this on a moving watercraft. It's amazing. Not the upskirt itself. I'm not much into Cougars of GILF's. But her deftness in one-upping the current crop of Hollywood celebutards is uncanny. After all, this is the original upskirt queen, right? Just try to picture "Basic Instinct" while seeing this. One more picture, offering up the extreme close-up, brought to exclusively by a telephoto lens. Kudos on wearing underpants, Ms. Stone. Next time, not so sheer.

Lily Allen See-Through Dress

I had noticed a recent increase in interest regarding Lily Allen and her naughty bits . . . and I think I might have found what you people were so desperately seeking. It's not an upskirt, but Lily Allen's see-through dress is giving you a pretty unobstructed view of her landing strip. Which would be great . . . if Lily Allen were even remotely sexy. Whatever floats your boat I guess.

Angelina Jolie - Topless and Blurry

I know you've probably seen Angelina Jolie nude in the past. Most likely on your hi-def TV. She shows some skin in pretty much every other movie she makes. But, these pictures are from real life. And life can be blurry sometimes. Just ask Hans Moleman. What is that you say? He's a fictional character from "The Simpsons"? . . . So's your face!

I'm not quite sure why Angelina Jolie decided to change clothes on her balcony, but hey, what the heck right? One more blurry pic below. It even has a little armpit action for people who are into that sort of stuff. I know you're out there. Pit-sniffers . . .

The Skinny on Colin Farrell

I can't quite put my finger on it, but I think Colin Farrell is looking a little different than usual. The side by side comparison pictures are making me wonder just what's going on here.

Actually, I already know what's going on. Here's the link to UK gossip rag "The Sun" who secured these pictures. Looks like Colin Farrell is doing the Christian Bale (in "The Machinist") and shedding a ton of weight for a movie he's working on called "Triage", where he plays a war photographer. A really skinny war photographer. I don't know if this look will excite the ladies . . . but I'm pretty sure the Anorexia Twins might have found their dream man.

Audrina Patridge - Acts in Bikini

When Audrina Patridge is not busy "acting" on the "reality" show "The Hills", she's busy "acting" in legitimately fictional filmed projects. Right now she's been cast in a movie called "The Reef", and I'm guessing it has something to do with oceans and water. Why else would she be in a bikini. For a chick that's got nothing going upstairs (much like the rest of the cast of "The Hills"), she does compensate by having quite the body. Is her acting any good though? I don't know. I don't really watch "The Hills". My wife does, or has in the past. But don't tell her I told you that. She's already pretty pissed I exposed her love for Bravo's "Top Chef" show. Ooops . . . But, getting back on topic. There are a couple of more pictures of Patridge for your viewing pleasures. Even a little something something for those who like the caboose.

Paul Rudd - Dance Dance Dance Revolution

I don't have much time for posting this morning. I'm due at the office by 5 AM (wiggety wiggety wack), but I saw this little video of Paul Rudd getting his dance on, and I thought "why the fuck not". Here he is, showing off dance moves from a straight-to-DVD Michelle Pfeiffer film called "I Could Never Be Your Woman". Sounds a little like a downer. This couple minutes of video here very well could be the only thing funny in this movie (and at that . . . just marginally). So, it looks like I've saved you a couple of bucks off a rental for the evening, or if you were thinking of purchasing the DVD, whatever this is selling for (probably $5 at the bargain DVD bin).

Natalie Portman - Just for the Heck of it

I can't really think of any legitimately newsworthy reason to post pictures of Natalie Portman. She's in Cannes, and these pictures were taken at the premier of a movie called "Blindness", which she's not even on. But . . . she just looks pretty. And I can't even get in trouble by thinking she looks pretty, because my wife shares the same opinion (I'll probably still get in trouble though). So, there you go. No upskirts, nip-slips or other inappropriate activities going on here. Just Natalie Portman looking great.

Ex-Pussycat Dolls Upskirt

I don't really care much for the "Pussycat Dolls". They kind of remind of me of Bratz dolls come to life. So, Nicole Scherzinger doesn't really do it for me. But I'm sure someone out there's standards are so low that they would actually want to see this woman exiting a vehicle and showing her panties at the same time. Classic upskirt moment. This one's for you, lowest common denominator guy (or girl).

Megan Fox - Dripping Wet and Topless

You know Megan Fox from last year's "Transformers" movie. The super-hot chick that that bastard Shia LeBoeuf gets to make out with at the end of the movie. Well, she's going to be appearing in Diablo Cody's (writer of the great "Juno") next project, titled "Jennifer's Body". They should work the word "hot" into that movie title, because, even though her nipples are covered by pasties (I know, what a crock of shit), she's still looking mighty fine. I don't know what the plot of the movie revolves around, but I don't think I'll care much, if this scene is in the film. The last picture has her covering up her boobs, but it has the added bonus of getting you close up to her dripping wet underwear, which lets you see her landing strip and a hint of camel-toe. It's nice to see a girl who keeps it clean and tidy down there.

Pineapple Express Red Ban Trailer

I saw this over at a stoner blog I frequent. I love a good stoner flick, and "Pineapple Express" looks pretty great from the trailer. It comes out later this year, but I'm already jonesing for it. I think I might be addicted to these types of movies. But, only when they're good. I still haven't seen the 2nd installment in the Harold & Kumar opus.

That's How I get my Jeans on too

Parkour is one of the coolest things to come out of France since . . . well, I can't think of anything else that's cool and French at the same time. But, anywho, these guys are applying parkour to getting dressed, and it's pretty wild. If you want to check out more of this crazy jumping and the like, and don't mind reading subtitles while you're watching a movie, check out "District B-13" on DVD. You won't regret it. It's a great film.

Heroes Promo

"Heroes", one of my favorite shows of all time, is coming back this fall to NBC. Hopefully, instead of a mini-season, we'll get the full shebang this time around. I swear, if the writers or the actors strike again this year, I will flip my shit. Anyway, some of the heroes might be villains? I can't fucking wait.

Mischa Barton Bikini - Something is Definitely Wrong Here

Usually, when I post pictures of celebrities in bikinis, it's a good thing. Well, Mischa Barton has just proven that it can also be bad. I'm not sure how someone as thin as her can develop such massive amounts of cellulite, but there it is. Check out the all-cottage-cheese thighs she's sporting. Her publicity reps are claiming foul-play here. To me, these pictures look pretty real. Oh well, I was never really into Mischa Barton. Haven't seen a single thing she's been in, wether on TV or in films. And, judging from these pictures, I'm better off not seeing her in any stage of undress. Unless I'm looking to vomit. Then, sure, pass me some more Mischa Barton bikini pictures. And a bucket.

John Mayer Makes Music

This might not be an exact, 100% accurate depiction of the music writing process, but it is 100% funny. Even though you hate John Mayer for bagging Jessica Simpson and other hot Hollywood chicks, you'd be a resentful fool not to at least chuckle a couple of times through this video. And, even if you hate it, there's a Kristen Bell cameo in there, for all the "Heroes" and "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" fans. Hell, even the "Veronica Mars" fans can get in on this action.

Quarantine Trailer

"Quarantine" is not a movie I've heard of until now. Thanks the guys over at Analog Medium, I now know this movie is coming out this year. Those guys have their fingers on the zombie pulse. How they found a pulse to begin with is a mystery. This movie is in the same vein as "The Blair Witch Project" and, more recently, George A. Romero's "Diary of the Dead". That film was fun but flawed. I'm thinking "Quarantine" will give us some fun zombie action, but in the end, will be fundamentally flawed. All of these "found footage" movies (I'm looking at you too "Cloverfield") are enjoyable, but end up missing the cinematic tour-de-force that they want to be. Fuck it . . . Zombies! I'm watching it.

Elisha Cuthbert Hearts Bikinis

Elisha Cuthbert is out doing what celebrities do when the rest of us have to go to work and lead real lives . . . she's out wearing bikinis in some beach somewhere. She's been actually photographed all week long in different bikinis and rather than have an individual entry for each one of her bikini sightings, I figured why not just put them all in one place. So, here she is, showing her appreciation for the two-piece wonder swimsuit. I can't really come up with anything else to say. I don't think she's working on anything right now. I'm too lazy to check IMDB right now. Aww . . . who cares. Bikinis!

The Price is Wrong, Bitch!

This video is hilarious. I had a creeping suspicion that the contestants on "The Price is Right" were not in the upper echelon of intellectual thinking. This video just proves my suspicion. Oh "Kim". That was an epic FAIL.

More Nipples from Crank Sequel

I know you've seen the Amy Smart nipple-tape pictures from a couple of days ago. That was from the set of the "Crank" sequel. There were more actual nippley pictures from that set involving Amy Smart, but they had a whole lot of Corey Haim in them, so I decided not to post them up. But, it seems like Amy Smart is not the only one getting her nipple-slip on during the filming of this movie. One of the other female stars, Bai Ling, is also showing us a little . . . actually, there's nothing little about Bai Ling's mutant nipples. They're huge. The first picture here is kind of an accidental one. The shirt just moves in a way where it happens. It's followed below by a picture showing Bai Ling making sure that everyone on set saw her gargantuan nips. They're kind of gross actually, and for the record, so is Bai Ling. So . . . why do I post this then? You people love the nipple slips. Look out in the next couple of days there might be some hot Jason Statham nipple action. I mean, it's the only logical thing that could happen looking at the track record for this movie.

Yahoo's Exclusive Hancock Trailer

"Hancock" is due to hit theaters July 2nd. I'm pretty excited about it. Looks like a fun, superhero romp. Plus, Will Smith seems to be getting better in his choices as of late. I loved (despite the weak CGI) "I Am Legend", and this movie looks like it might be right up my alley. This exclusive Yahoo trailer shows you a little more of the movie than the regular trailers. It includes tossing a kid into the air. Pretty hilarious.

Amy Smart Nipple Slip - Where's the Tape?

I don't know if these pictures are recent. To tell you the truth, I was just bouncing around the interweb when I saw a link to this through the Buzzfeed network. That's that thing with the interesting stuff on my sidebar. It comes courtesy of a website called Hollywood Tuna. They seem to have a pretty decent website. I'd check it out if I were you. You just might find more nipple slips of your current Hollywood fixation du jour. But, back to Amy Smart. She does not have the hottest rack in Hollywood, but she's a bit on the cute site. So, it doesn't matter that she's not rocking Pamela Anderson-sized tits. A couple of more pictures below, and if you want to check out Amy Smart without a top on, then check out the nipple tape post from a couple of days ago.

Amy Winehouse Monthly Update - Brought to you by McDonald's

Ah, Amy Winehouse. Is McDonald's sponsoring your downward decline? Why does she keep eating that garbage. Anyway, this post is not entirely about Winehouse's eating (or lack-there-of) habits. Rather, we're going to focus on her professional work. Actually, her inability to perform her work. Which, should get in the way of her buying McD's in the future. She was supposed to do the title track for the new James Bond film "The Quantum of Solace", but . . . that might not work out after all. This is what Mark Ronson, music producer for the new Bond movie, had to say:

"We tried to work for a little bit. I'm not sure she's ready to work on music yet," he said.
Asked if the Quantum of Solace track will be made he added: "I don't think so unless by some miracle of science it gets recorded and someone sings a vocal on it so probably not. We did work on it but we never finished it so that's about it."
Asked if the pair are due to work on other projects he replied: "No, we tried to work for a little bit. I'm not sure she's ready to work on music yet".

I hope she gets her shit together soon. This guy pretty much contributed to her previous album release hitting #1 in music charts and helped secure a Grammy for this coked-out McD's loving waste of human space.