Getting Jiggly With It

It's been a couple of days since I've posted anything here. It's the end of the month. I've just come off having to work 10-hour workdays back to back and today I have to be in the office from 5 AM - 2 PM to finish off the month. I do get some much needed time-off tomorrow. But, to make up for the absence of new shit here, check out this video of this fat guy dancing.

The Real Nude Housewives of NYC

If you don't watch Bravo's reality programming on that network, you probably don't know who Alex McCord is. I don't watch "The Real Housewives of New York City", but my wife does (haha! the secret's out!), so from time to time, I am subjected to their antics and the such while I'm waiting for whatever episode she's watching is over. So, this one's for you honey. That, and this woman has some incredibly huge nipples. Those things are almost as big as the pencils you use to keep track of your golf score. That, and her mighty moose-knuckle. She's given birth, and it shows. She could pass the New York Subway system through that thing. One more picture below. If you want to see more (why? she's like a naked bride of Frankenstein), check out Splash News Online's coverage of this.

Opening Weekend Movies - 4/25/2008

Baby Mama - Hmm . . . looks like refried shit. Sure, there are some funny people involved in this turd-fest of a movie, but it seems like they're in it for the paycheck. Which I can understand. But, don't expect me to go to your movie if you're just going to dial it in like a punk.



Deception - Hugh Jackman and Ewan McGregor star in this thriller about a mild mannered accountant that gets sucked into a world of sexy . . . wait for it . . . deception. Despite its lackluster namesake, this movie actually looks interesting. I don't know if I'll be watching it, but it is rated "R". So, there might be a booby or an ass shown. If you're lucky, it won't be a male ass.



Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay - Wow. Another "Harold and Kumar" movie. I went into watching their White Castle escapade hopeful that I had finally found a stoner comedy worth watching not stoned (not that I do that anyway . . . ahem). I was fairly disappointed to say the least. When I first started seeing the teaser trailers for their newest cinematic outing, I was instantly repulsed by it. The trauma of the last movie still lingering in my subconscious. But, I keep seeing little bits and pieces of this movie online and in commercials . . . and I don't know . . . I kinda want to see it now. Is that weird. Does that make me co-dependent and masochistic all at the same time?

They even have a red trailer. Maybe they're trying to sweet-talk me into watching it, and then they'll slap me in the face with mediocrity.

Julianne Moore See-Through Action

Julianne Moore might not be the youngest chick out there that's showing off her nipples. I mean, she's 47, but the rising popularity of "MILF's" and "cougars" might mean that someone out there might be actually looking for a picture just like this one. You could also rent "Boogie Nights". I'm pretty sure she got naked in that. I don't remember though. Rent it anyway, it's a fun movie. But, back to Julianne Moore. The picture was taken for a French "Vogue" issue, and I have to say, despite her rapidly slipping youth, Julianne Moore looks pretty OK.

Those Damned Freaky-Deaky Dutch

What the fuck man. This is terrible. That guy is totally molesting a clearly underage boy on Dutch TV. I don't even know what to say right now. It's not funny. I don't get why the live studio audience doesn't do anything. Evidently, a grown man kissing the neck of a young boy is no big deal for them.

I'm uncomfortable after watching that. Thank you Paul de Leeuw (guy in the video). Bastard.

Natalie Portman Vs. Dog

Hey look, it's Natalie Portman. Getting peed on via canine. Could that be considered "beastiality"? It's at least some sick form of "watersport". Or maybe she just confused the shaggy puppy with her new boyfriend Devendra Barnhart. He looks like he would be into peeing on her.

Emma Watson shows Barely Legal Upskirt

I guess it was inevitable. From your fervent searches, I knew the day would come when Emma Watson would actually show an upskirt. I'm just glad that it happened after her 18th birthday (yes, finally legal) and not before that. I don't need that kind of thing on my conscience. That, and I don't want the FBI beating down my door to seize my computer. I love this thing. It's my baby. But, getting back to Emma Watson. She's showing us the classic "getting out of a car and exposing myself" move that has become so popular these days. But, she's changing it up a little. While she is wearing underwear, it is, for some strange and sexy reason, see-through. The angle doesn't show any labia (aww . . . perverts), but it does show off a nice healthy tuft of crotch-carpet. That should be enough to get you dirty fuckers going.



Thanks to Egotastic.com. Head on out there for more pictures. If you can work that computer with your free hand.

Zombie Strippers Trailer

The cinematic tour de force "Zombie Strippers" is about to be released. I'm not sure if it's going straight to DVD, or if it will play your local cineplex for a few miserably short days. With a name like that, the movie has to be so bad it's good. Robert Englund, from the "Friday the 13th" movies is in, along with Jenna Jameson, who by now, after all of that plastic surgery, is starting to look like an actual zombie stripper.

Blogs are for Wusses Version 2.0

Not sure if you've noticed, but the good ol' BAFW has gone through a bit of an overhaul as of late. Gone is the utterly cluttered sidebar and it has been replaced by a slightly more orderly and infinitely easier to manage one. I had been using the original template with the HTML set-up that was available when I first started this blog in 2005. Since then, Blogger has updated and made it easier to manage things. I learned that when I started up my 2nd blog: The Beard Growth Project. I liked it so much, that after 2 and a half month's worth of procrastination, I updated everything here and I'm liking the new BAFW. I had to start everything from scratch, so you'll notice there are less ads hanging around, but I've kept all the important ones. I had to get rid of the Blogroll link list (I mean, it's there, but I don't like it much), which means I lost a lot of the links that had been previously displayed on the sidebar. I went by memory as to what I had in there, but I'm damn sure I had more there. If you're linking BAFW on your site/blog and your link is currently omitted, let me know so I can add you to the list. Just drop a comment in here. And let me know if this layout is better than the previous one. Anyway, I'm going back to my Sunday relaxation schedule.

Hayden Panettiere in Short Shorts

I was going to title this post "Hayden Panettiere: Shorty in Short Shorts" . . . but I felt there was too much "short" going on with that, so I got rid of the "shorty" part and just went with what eventually made it onto the post. But, on to more pressing matters. Hayden Panettiere is looking pretty hot I'd say in those daisy duke-style jean shorts, and that cleavage-y top is helping too. Not to mention the push-up bra she seems to be rocking, kinda helps her out in the boobage department. Hayden might not be the bustiest indestructible cheerleader, but it's nice to see her trying. These pictures were taken on-set of a new movie she's part of called "I Love You Beth Cooper". I don't know if she's playing the titular character or if she's in the supporting cast, but these pictures just scored this movie a viewing by me . . . on cable. More pictures below.

Hayden Panettiere plays a sexy bigfoot

For the booty lovers out there. Keep the dream alive

Jessica Alba Develops

Jessica Alba is still pregnant. I had stopped paying attention to her because, truthfully, I'm not all that into pregnant chicks. I'm sure that'll change when my wife and I go through our own pregnancy, or it might change now. Looking at these pictures of Jessica Alba walking around with her preggo-boobs, I can see how there are advantages to the whole pregnant thing. Other than the eventual kid that'll pop-out of her. I even think her boobs might be pregnant as well. Who knows. Anything seems to be possible these days. In any case, aside from the large belly, Alba is looking pretty good lately. This one's for all the preggo-lovers out there. Enjoy.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall Clip

So, this movie looks like a lot of fun. I don't know when it's coming out exactly (what am I? your information headquarters? fuck off and go to Yahoo movies or something), but when it does, I'm going to be there. Specially when scenes like these are going to be in the movie. This little clip gives you a little peak at an uncomfortably hilarious scene that is followed by some of the freakiest sex I've ever witnessed . . . and I've seen stuff that would cripple a weaker person's psyche. So, enjoy the clip, which features Kristen Bell getting it on . . . crazy style.

Sienna Miller Bikini Update . . Now with More Cameltoe

Every time I post something about Sienna Miller, I feel like I'm beating a dead horse. I mean, is there any part of this woman that we haven't seen naked or on the verge of being naked? Probably not, but it is escaping my memory if we've seen any camel-toe action from her recently. Which explains why I'm posting the picture above. It's somewhat nice to see that Miller has gotten the hang of the whole bikini thing. Not like yesterday, when that just kept falling off or she kept removing it herself. So, there you go camel-toe lovers. Never say I don't do anything for you.

Heidi Montag Raps?

Heidi Montag was on MTV's TRL recently (at least, it looks like TRL, who knows, I don't watch MTV much these days anyway), sharing the spotlight with rap star Nelly. So, of course, she decided to drop some rhymes on an unsuspecting crowd and the rest of America, and it went just as bad as you'd expect it to. Even the host of the show described Montag's lyrical stylings as "flowing like a leaky prostate". Heidi did not even get that well spoken burn, as she tried to get a check + for effort. I swear, I can almost ready Nelly's mind while watching this video. He's got to be thinking: "Damn this bitch can't rap, but I'd put her mouth to good use". Anyway, enjoy (if you're into shit like this) the video.

Sienna Miller Accidental Bikini Nip-Slip Evolves

Sienna Miller, famous actress for I don't know what exactly, was frolicking at the beach when this little accidental nip-slip happened. But, this is Sienna Miller, so a nip-slip really wouldn't suffice for her. It's nice that she's always trying to improve things, which brings us to the picture below. Same day, different location, probably still at the beach, but now, Sienna has completely removed the top half of her bikini. She turned an accidental nip-slip into a full on topless incident. If that's not proof of evolution, I don't know what is.

Tetris: The Movie

Oh yeah, you read right. Someone went out there and made a movie about Tetris. From the trailer, it looks like it was all shot with green/blue screens and whatnot, kind of like how "300" and "Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow" were shot, but it looks much less polished than those two movies. It does have an epic feel to it, but the cast of no-name actors coupled with a probable directorial debut does not bode well for this film. If anyone does see it, please let me know if it's good or bad, or something else in between.

Oh, and did I mention that videogame movies inherently suck donkey balls? "Tetris: The Movie" has that negative mark against it already built in.

Two-Headed Baby

I was going to post something about Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz getting engaged today . . . because, lets face it, that's what I do around here. But then, I saw this picture and I was like "what! That baby has two faces. Screw those douche-tards, this gets on BAFW". So, here it is, an Indian (dot not feathers) baby girl born with two heads/faces that is being worshiped like a Goddess in her small village. You can check out more over at CNN.com if you think this is a hoax of some sort. It's not. That baby is 100% for truth.

Natalie Portman is Dating that?

I'm at a loss for words right now. Natalie Portman, one of the hottest women in Hollywood, is letting that touch her. I just can't wrap my head around it. Not only is this "man" getting to spend time with her, but they also spend time together in the nude. Fucking. I know. It's almost inconceivable. I just don't get it. Mull it over.

Olivia Munn gets Bikini on in Jamaica

I really don't think I need to justify posting Olivia Munn bikini pictures. Right? The only other thing I should mention is that these pictures were taken in Jamaica during "Attack of the Show"'s 4/20 special that will air in a couple of weeks. So . . . drugs are not bad? If they inspire bikini action like this, obviously the government has been lying to us about the negative effects of marijuana. So, pack yourself a bowl and enjoy the rest of the Olivia Munn bikini stoner action.

Cloverfield Alternate Endings

"Cloverfield" is getting its DVD release this month, and just in time for that, a couple of the alternate endings from that release have found their way onto YouTube. I enjoyed this movie, so chances are that I'll get it when it comes out on DVD. These endings don't deviate too much from what was originally included in the theatrical release, but they're still cool and therefore warrant a post about them.

Charlton Heston: 1924 - 2008

Charlton Heston passed away a couple of days ago. I just heard about it this morning when I was looking through some websites. The picture above is not meant to ridicule the man. I used to have that picture on a t-shirt a long time ago. It was, hands-down, my favorite piece of clothing at the time and I wore that t-shirt until the image was no longer recognizable. Some people might not have agreed with Heston and his stand on the 2nd Amendment and his long running leadership of the NRA, but I don't think anyone can argue that this man was a living legend. He will be missed around the BAFW HQ.

Mena Suvari's Boyfriend Loves da Butt

I don't know what Mena Suvari is up to lately. Frankly, I had forgotten she even existed. That's how low on my radar she is. But then, she resurfaced with brand-spanking new bikini pictures. I guess that's all it takes to pique my interest. I don't know who the guy in the pictures is . . . but I'm willing to bet it's not a close cousin. Most likely, it's Mena's new boytoy, who is a bit on the grabby side. You'll see in a couple of pictures down, where this guy just is holding on for dear life. Like, if he let go of Mena's ample behind, he'd slip into oblivion with little hope for salvation.

I'd like to take a moment to make a comment on Mena Suvari's physique. It's not negative, but . . . when I look at her, I can't stop thinking about mullets. It must be because her body is a little bit of business in the front, and party in the back. She doesn't have much in the way of a bosom . . . but that booty is outta control (in a good way). Just a personal observation.

Hilary Duff Scorpion Dance

I know a lot of you out there find Hilary Duff to be attractive. Some may think even hot. But, I just don't see it. Maybe it's because every time I think of her (few and far between mind you), I make an instant connection to her horse-faced sister, Hayley Duff. But, this post is not about that. It's about her dancing with a scorpion in her pants. Yup. It's for something called "War Inc.", which also stars John Cusack, which you can see in the clip. He's got the perfect reaction to seeing Hilary drop the scorpion into her nether regions. That's exactly what I would have done. Followed by projectile vomiting. Because I'm a classy gentleman.

Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen wear Bikinis, confuse Penises

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen were recently spotted enjoying some bikini time on their own (don't ask me which is which, I don't have my DNA test kit on me) in Australia. While I know they look like a strange mix of E.T. and a troll doll from time to time, most of these pictures are super-blurry, which is helping me stop focusing on that preconceived image of them, and is actually drawing my attention to the bikini portion of the pictures. So it's only natural to post these pictures, because that's what I do around here. I post pictures of Hollywood stars in bikinis. Right? I know, I'm still trying to convince myself this was a good idea . . .

Even though the blurriness is making me forget about their faces, they twins are still not built like actual women. It makes me feel a little wrong to check these pictures out. Kind of like driving past a Catholic school for young teenage girls. You know you shouldn't look, but you still do anyway. So, all of this is confusing my penis. I hope the rest of you aren't having such a troubled time right now. For those that are into the Olsen twins (I know you're out there), this must be a wank-off dream.